Obama Demands Action on Temperature Inequality

January 6th, 2014 Scott Ott

President Obama said he’ll “focus like a laser” for the remainder of his term on “closing the vast gulf between warmest and coldest.” Temperature inequality, as shown on this map, reached 127 degrees in recent days.

(2013-01-06) — The growing gap between warmest and coldest is “the penultimate defining challenge of our age,” President Obama announced just hours after returning to Washington D.C. following a two-week vacation in Hawaii.

“If Congress will not move to stop temperature inequality,” Obama said, “then I will. Living in one of the more advanced nations in North America, we can’t wait for the end of partisan bickering to pass sensible regulations.”

Moments after stepping off of Marine One at the White House, the president said “there’s no time for delay, because the thermal gap has grown noticeably even in the past couple of days.”

First Lady Michelle Obama, who remained in Hawaii while her husband and daughters returned to the east coast, noted that temperature inequality has impacted average Americans’ relationships, making distant family members grow cold.

While some scientists questioned whether the gap has grown, and whether legislation can do anything about it, the White House said those researchers lack credibility “because they don’t receive federal grants very soon.”

Posted in Economy, Science Tags: AGW, D.C., First Lady, global warming, Hawaii, Obama, White House

« ‘Little Sisters’ Unionize, Seek ObamaCare Exemption

Activists Push NYC to Permit Medicinal Coca-Cola Use »

Both comments and pings are currently closed.

6 Responses to “Obama Demands Action on Temperature Inequality”

1. Obama Demands Action on Temperature Inequality says:

   January 6, 2014 at 8:02 am

   […] By Scott Ott […]

2. upnorthlurkin says:

   January 6, 2014 at 1:50 pm

   I see you “Still got it”, young man! I’ve missed your brilliant satire.

3. prettyolder says:

   January 6, 2014 at 6:56 pm

   Help !! I am here in Wisconsin , it is - 11 Degrees. I believed Algore and 0bama when they promised Global Warming (sob) . Now I feel like such a fool, a cold fool. Why did they have to lie? Waaaahhhhh!

4. Hawkeye says:

   January 6, 2014 at 8:54 pm

   You’re TOO Funny Scott! Today’s low here in Middle TN was about 3F (at 7am when I was working outside) and the high was about 13F (when I went to lunch). I guess that puts me in the “lower middle class” of temperature inequality versus the “upper class” 70s of Obama’s Hawaii vacation. Obama needs to “spread the wealth” and bring some of that hot air here to TN. 🙂

5. IMAO » Blog Archive » Link of the Day: Satire - Obama Demands Action on Temperature Inequality says:

   February 3, 2014 at 6:00 pm

   […] [High Praise! to ScrappleFace] […]

6. The Truth about that anti-war march | DARTBLOG says:

   January 31, 2015 at 5:05 am

   […] Scott Ott reports: “Organizers said the biggest challenge facing the anti-war movement today is how to hold together a loose coalition of groups with divergent agendas using celebrities who peaked in popularity 10 to 30 years ago.” […]