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Man Carjacks Own Family Hoping for Obama Invite

by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · 39 Comments · · Print This Story Print This Story

(2009-07-31) — East Stroudsburg (Pa.) police reported today that a man seen forcing his way into a car downtown was actually a local university professor carjacking his family in his own vehicle in hopes of getting an invitation to the White House.

The incident happened just hours after President Barack Obama shared a beer with Cambridge (Ma.) Police Sgt. James Crowley, and Harvard Prof. Henry Louis Gates, a friend of the president’s who Mr. Crowley had recently arrested for disorderly conduct.

A spokesman for the East Stroudsburg police department said officers responding to the call were taken aback when the man busted out the driver’s side window and began shouting accusations of racism as they were stepping out of their cruiser.

According to the police report, as officers approached, the man hollered at passersby, “This is how the pigs treat the negro man. Our nation is haunted by racist cops acting stupidly. They’re going to cuff me and drag me to the paddy wagon just because I couldn’t get into my own car.”

When officers tried to calm the man, asking him to put the crow bar down, witnesses said he shouted, “Your mother puts the crow bar down.”

“The officers’ suspicions were heightened when they noticed the children in the back seat clapping, and the woman in the passenger seat smiling,” the spokesman said. Later, the suspect’s wife acknowledged that she had asked him to do it as an anniversary present to fulfill her dream of meeting the President and the First Lady.

She said she was impressed by the professionalism of the police toward her husband, but wished that “they had roughed him up a bit to increase my chances of seeing Michelle’s bare arms in person.”

White House spokesman Robert Gibbs said a presidential invitation seemed unlikely, since Mr. Obama “has already schooled the nation in how to treat police officers.”

Police withheld the name of the faux carjacker under the terms of his university tenure.

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Tags: Law · U.S. News

39 responses so far ↓

  • 1 boberinyetagain // Jul 31, 2009 at 9:28 am

    I don’t blame him. Free beer is a powerful motivator!
    If it’s free it’s for me!!

    Good one Scott!!

  • 2 gafisher // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:02 am

    Beer is passe; I wouldn’t carjack my family for anything less than a fine French wine.

  • 3 boberinyetagain // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:09 am

    I’d prefer a rum and coke mind you but again…it’s free. Don’t lose sight of that

  • 4 NeaL // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:10 am

    I’ll wait until the next President has been sworn into office, before I even think of doing something so extreme just to meet her.

  • 5 gafisher // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:11 am

    The unnamed victim should have been more original — Cleavon Little did it long ago and better in “Blazing Saddles.”

  • 6 jedp2@cox.net // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:26 am

    Sneaky Scott. You never once mentioned the ethnicity of the driver or the police or what their favorite beer flavor is.

  • 7 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:30 am

    Caution:
    If the “carjacker” is Caucasian and the police officer is Negro, this ploy will not work.

  • 8 JQ // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:44 am

    “Your mother puts the crow bar down.”

    Beautiful, Scott. I’m sure that one hurt.

  • 9 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 31, 2009 at 11:05 am

    Red Stripe contains reggae rhythm.

  • 10 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 31, 2009 at 11:13 am

    Warning:
    Eating or drinking is contraindicated while viewing this.
    :shock:

  • 11 upnorthlurkin // Jul 31, 2009 at 12:06 pm

    Thanks for the warning, JL3. Now this really blew our sox off last night when we saw the commercial…. Seriously, I’m at a loss.

  • 12 Darthmeister // Jul 31, 2009 at 12:34 pm

    Maybe mugging a little old lady in the crosswalk might get an invite … ya think?

  • 13 Darthmeister // Jul 31, 2009 at 12:45 pm

    BTW, no wonder liberals are willing to reduce themselves to harsh words and disapproving glares in interrogating Muslim terrorists. If in liberals’ kneejerk minds the mere fact Policeman Crowley was doing his job in responding to a “break in” call somehow constitutes some form of racism, then any enhanced techniques that are used against the enemies of this country will be seen as “torture” by the same kind of people.

    The supreme irony here is it was “Scholar” Gates who was using the harsh words and disapproving glares in his own private little war against THE MAN and not the other way around. So, as a matter of logical extension with a twist, I guess it would be okay for American interrogators to make disparaging remarks about a terrorist’s “momma” since liberals actually applaud that sort of thing during civil discourse.

  • 14 da Bunny // Jul 31, 2009 at 1:09 pm

    Mr. Obama “has already schooled the nation in how to treat police officers.

    Yes, and it has been a real pleasure to view the “teachable moments” that have ensued via Obama’s plummeting “poll numbers.” Let the “learning” begin, Barry.

  • 15 JQ // Jul 31, 2009 at 1:12 pm

    Check out this insightful article by Ruben Navarette, Jr. over on CNN.com:

    http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/07/31/navarrette.gates.crowley/index.html

    I thought the following was an especially interesting observation:

    “We also heard from black police officers who work with Crowley, including a black sergeant who was at the scene. Not only did they defend their comrade, but they also made clear that it was Gates who was trying to create — in the words of Cambridge police officer Kelly King, a black female — a ’smokescreen’ that the imbroglio was about race when it wasn’t.

    Right. If anything, this was about class. According to the police report, Gates told Crowley: ‘You don’t know who you’re messing with’ and then apparently tried to go over the sergeant’s head by calling the chief of police during the confrontation. After his arrest, black academics came to his defense and insisted that, if this could happen to ‘Skip’ Gates, it could happen to anyone.

    Catch that? The black elites who depicted Gates as Huey Newton in a tweed coat long ago stopped seeing themselves as part of the community they claim to represent to the rest of academia. Police might roust other African-Americans. But Skip and his posse spend their summers on Martha’s Vineyard. They’re better than ordinary black folks, and they expect to be treated as such.”

    And finally, here’s the actual police report, in case you haven’t seen it yet:

    http://www.scribd.com/doc/17512830/Gates-Police-Report

  • 16 Darthmeister // Jul 31, 2009 at 1:34 pm

    Obama: ” … instead of (uh) ginning up anger and hyperbole, (uh) you know, everybody can just (uh) spend a little bit of time with some self-reflection and recognizing that (uh) everybody has different points of view.”

    Rather noble words from someone who himself was “ginning up anger and hyperbole” with his own stupid hyperbolic comment about the “police acting stupidly”. Yet another liberal hypocrite we can add to the list … you know, that list of liberals who claim to be compassionate, open-minded, understanding, seeing both sides of an issue, tolerant of opposing views, and not engaging in name calling or other kinds of ad hominem attacks.

  • 17 Fred Sinclair // Jul 31, 2009 at 2:54 pm

    da Bunny #14 - AMEN and again I say AMEN!

    At age 71 there’s not a lot that gets my heart beating faster, however watching the usurper shooting himself in the foot, over and over again probably does me more good than the meds I take.

    The great beauty is in watching the usurper following in the peanut farmer’s footsteps; paving the way for a Ronald Reagan landslide and now B.O. is making wide the pathway for a major win for Sarah Palin in 2012. (I hope and pray she can convince Senator Jim Inhofe [R-OK] or Senator Tom Coburn [R-OK] to be her running mate.

    That way when the Lord calls me home, I can leave here with a big smile and a Cheshire Cat grin (ORIGIN late 18th cent.: of unknown origin, but it is said that cheeses made in Cheshire, England, used to be marked with the face of a smiling cat.); knowing that the Lord has rescinded the Marxism curse (a/k/a - the usurper) and has granted America another Christian Leader.

  • 18 JQ // Jul 31, 2009 at 3:49 pm

    Darthmeister says:

    “Rather noble words from someone who himself was ‘ginning up anger and hyperbole’ with his own stupid hyperbolic comment about the ‘police acting stupidly.’ ”

    Great point, Darth.

    Unfortunately, Republicans are the only group who can really wear the label “hypocrite,” for some reason. You’ll find that Obama’s blatant racism immediately following the incident will be completely overwritten by his salt-of-the-earth “settle it over a beer” strategy.

    We saw the real, from-the-heart Barack Obama when he ranted about the stupidity of the white police force; we saw the polished, made for TV version when he sat down for a beer with the “stupid white police officer.”

  • 19 R.A.M. // Jul 31, 2009 at 5:04 pm

    As I mentioned on another thread, doesn’t Obama know that beer can have the same negative effects on the human body as soda pop and fruit drinks that he wants to tax because of those negativities?

    Just askin’! :lol:

    From Gates own words about how his mother “beamed” when she heard Malcolm X “stickin’ it to the white man”, I’m sure he has made his momma proud, if she is still alive!

  • 20 JQ // Jul 31, 2009 at 5:37 pm

    R.A.M. says:

    “From Gates own words about how his mother ?beamed? when she heard Malcolm X ?stickin? it to the white man?, I?m sure he has made his momma proud, if she is still alive!”

    Gates is very fluent when it comes to speaking with mommas of all walks of life. That’s why he told Officer Crowley, “ya, I’ll speak with your momma outside.” He just wanted to make sure that there was no further miscommunication between himself and the law enforcement officer, so he attempted to place a qualified interpreter between them.

    So misunderstood, the sad, wealthy, educated, elite black man in America…

  • 21 JQ // Jul 31, 2009 at 5:42 pm

    Not to belabor the point, but this incident should be a wake-up call to those who honestly believe that Obama doesn’t subscribe to Jeremiah Wright’s school of thought. He may have distanced himself from the man for political reasons, but Obama hasn’t forgotten the mantra:

    The backward white man hates the victimized black man.
    The backward white man hates the victimized black man.
    The backward white man hates the victimized black man.
    The backward white man hates the victimized black man.

  • 22 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 31, 2009 at 7:51 pm

    JQ~~
    Exactly!

    Not to mention the SDS influence and that of the underbelly of Chicago thuggery and,for seasoning, some kind of weird Soviet-style Socialism.

    Conservatives think and that’s why they’re after us (reeking of Stalin, imo, and Tsar Barrack the Omnipotent). We have ears to hear and eyes to see and mouths and keyboards and, something too often left out of the conversation, we’re all evangelists—they have an aversion to the Light.

    We know what this actually means:

    Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
    ~~~Matthew 5:48

  • 23 camojack // Jul 31, 2009 at 7:55 pm

    Officer Crowley: “I’m only here for the beer.”

  • 24 onlineanalyst // Jul 31, 2009 at 8:09 pm

    Every picture tells a story. Compare and contrast.

  • 25 JamesonLewis3rd // Aug 1, 2009 at 12:46 am

    onlineanalyst~~
    :shock:
    I found this link I followed from that comparison you shared (talk about a thousand words, eh?) to be somewhat amusing.
    ~~~~~
    [paraphrasing something Conan allegedly said]

    Sergeant Crowley looked across the table at Joe Biden as they all got comfortable and said, “You have the right to remain silent.”

  • 26 Possumtrot // Aug 1, 2009 at 3:38 am

    Da Bunny already stole my thunder about “teachable moments” and The Red Herring “schooling the nation in how to treat police officers.”

    If Great Scott gets elected, will someone file an ethics complaint about him continuing to write these great columns?

    Years ago, the late, great Hosea Williams snatched the ticket clipboard away from a Georgia state trooper and smacked him across the face with it, chipping the trooper’s teeth. All the while, Hosey was unloading verbally about racism and police persecution of black folks.

    Aside from adding assault to the DUI charge, Hosey had blithely ignored one other obvious fact: the trooper he attacked was the first black state trooper ever hired in Georgia.

    There’s not much I wouldn’t do for a free beer or three, and I’ll bet The White House even stocks Guinness Stout. However, making nice with The Plagiarist and The Red Herring might give me pause. Sgt. Crowley’s a bigger man than I am.

    BTW, wasn’t Crowley the one who tried to save Reggie-what’s-his-name’s life with mouth-to-mouth a while back? That simple act of doing his duty speaks volumes to the true content of his soul. I don’t follow basketball at all, but when that Boston Celtic collapsed, it made for some dramatic TV footage. Crowley didn’t see a sinister Negro, he saw a dying man and did his best to save him.

    Ann Coulter is right; liberals always run to blacks when the going gets tough for their vapid arguments.

    Free beer fueled 4000 words about “Gates-gate” and a variation on the Leftsist mantra of who the new millenium’s “Hitler” might be over at United Possums International.

    Boy! That verification box gets harder to read every day!

  • 27 Beerme // Aug 1, 2009 at 10:41 am

    Well, as a certified beer snob (passe?!?!?I beer fart in your general direction!), I must weigh-in on the Great One’s Beerfest (All apologies to Wayne Gretsky…). Obama drank Bud Light, while Gates had a Samuel Adams Light. Crowley drank a Blue Moon (a Belgian White brewed by Coors) while Biden-the “regular Joe” who spends so much time at that Scranton bar that closed 20 years ago-had a non-alcoholic brew of some sort.

    July is American Craft Beer Month, people! Only Gates had an American beer and a Craft Beer at that! Shame!

    Now THAT’s sticking it to the Man!

  • 28 R.A.M. // Aug 1, 2009 at 1:14 pm

    OLA and JL3: Those are GREAT comparison photos! I saw one at Michelle Malkin’s website but have no way of putting the two together.

    The one was of the Obama “beerfest” and the other of the pound table discussion of the four guys on an old SNL skit, where they all drank beer and when asked questions about which football team would win or was best ALWAYS answered, “da Bears”!

    If you want to see it it is at:

    http://michellemalkin.com/

    third picture down on the right hand side.

    GEE—Chicago Bears, Obama, members of “Second City” (Chicago), Obama’s “beerfest”, maybe Malkin is on to something? ;-)

    Beerme: I hope you won’t be too shocked if we find out Obama had ALL the beer bottles/cans drained and refilled with “Obama kool aid”!

  • 29 Fred Sinclair // Aug 1, 2009 at 1:15 pm

    Probably today’s Hollywood would like to bury this movie. All America needs to see this movie again. Where is Jefferson Smith when we really, really need him?

    If you haven’t see this movie in awhile I suggest you watch again. Well written and acted! Capra had it together for this movie!

    http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-897129633961255565&ei=tF9ySq6HBIzcrQL53IDbCg&q=free+movie&hl=en

    FULL MOVIE: 2 Hours 10 Minutes

    Mr. Smith Goes to Washington A naive man is appointed to fill a vacancy in the US Senate. His plans promptly collide with political corruption, but he doesn’t back down.

  • 30 Fred Sinclair // Aug 1, 2009 at 1:38 pm

    Has anybody tried to post to “comments” at Townhall? It lists -0- comments and now I know why. I’ve spent the last ten minutes trying to “log on” but to no avail. I’m told I’m already registered but then it won’t accept my password.

    When I click on “forgot your password” I fill in the info for a new password but when I click on “submit” all I get is an apology. “Sorry, the page you requested is unavailable.”

    What’s up Scott?

  • 31 R.A.M. // Aug 1, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    On the Lighter Side

    The CEO was scheduled to speak at an important convention, so he asked one of
    his employees to write him a punchy, 20-minute speech.

    When the CEO returned from the big event, he was furious.

    “What’s the idea of writing me an hour-long speech?” he demanded to know. “Half
    the audience walked out before I finished.”

    The employee was baffled. “I wrote you a 20-minute speech,” he replied. “And I
    gave you the two extra copies you asked for.”

    This will, no doubt, eventually happen to “Telepropter Obama”, probably sooner rather than later! :lol:

  • 32 Fred Sinclair // Aug 1, 2009 at 10:19 pm

    Jumbo Joke: Humor the Way You Like It

    Perfect Solution To Senior Health Care

    While discussing the upcoming Universal Health Care Program with my sister-in-law the other day, I think we have found the solution. I am sure you have heard the idea that if you’re a senior you need to suck it up and give up the idea that you need any health care. A new hip? Unheard of. We simply can’t afford to take care of you anymore. You don’t need any medications for your high blood pressure, diabetes, heart problems, etc. — the same old dodge keeps coming back: “Let’s take care of the young people. After all, they will be ruling the world very soon.”

    Uh huh.

    So here is the solution: When you turn 70, you get a gun and 4 bullets. In return for shooting 2 Senators and 2 Representatives, you get free health care for life!

    How does it work?

    Of course, you will be sent to prison. There you will get 3 meals a day, a roof over your head, and all the health care you need! New teeth? Great! Need glasses? No problem. New hip, knee, kidney, lung, heart? Bring it on. And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you that you are too old for health care. And, since you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay any income tax, either.

    I really think we have a Perfect Solution!

  • 33 Fred Sinclair // Aug 1, 2009 at 11:36 pm

    The New Administration’s 10 Commandments

    I. Thou shalt have no God in America for we are no longer a Christian nation, because the “One” says so.

    II. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, except for the President’s multitude of Photo Ops.

    III. Thou shalt not utter my middle name in vain or in public.

    IV. Remember tax day, April 15th, to keep it holy.

    V. Honour thy father and thy mother until they are too old and sick to care for. They will then cost our public-funded health-care system too much money.

    VI. Thou shalt not kill, unless you have an unwanted, unborn baby. For it would be an abomination to punish any woman with a child.

    VII. Thou shalt not commit adultery if you are conservative or a Republican. Liberals and Democrats are hereby forgiven for all of their infidelity and immorality, but the careers of conservatives will be forever destroyed.

    VIII. Thou shalt not steal, until you’ve been elected to public office. Only then is it acceptable to take money from hard-working, successful citizens, removing their choices for charitable giving, and give it to those who are illegal immigrants, who do not work, or those who simply do not have the motivation to better their own lives.

    IX. Thou shalt not discriminate against thy neighbor unless they are conservative, Caucasian, or Christian.

    X. Thou shalt not covet because it is simply unnecessary. I will place a heavy tax burden on those that have achieved the American Dream so that in four years no one will have any wealth or material goods left for you to covet.

  • 34 Fred Sinclair // Aug 2, 2009 at 4:00 pm

    Q. The president’s progress with the battered economy has been both praised and criticized. How well are his efforts measuring up with you?

    Extremely well. We are undoubtedly moving in the right direction. 12%

    Fairly well. There’s still a long way to go. 8%

    Not well at all. His plans are hurting more than helping. 78%

    Not sure/No opinion. 2%

    1204413 votes

    http://js.polls.yahoo.com/quiz/quiziframe.php?poll_id=46067

  • 35 Fred Sinclair // Aug 2, 2009 at 9:43 pm

    :-)

  • 36 Fred Sinclair // Aug 2, 2009 at 9:46 pm

    MOVIE: Two (2) Hours — Meet John Doe By Frank Capra, Gary Cooper, Barbara Stanwyck

    A wonderful Movie! It is Frank Capra at his best! Well written and acted!

    For all who love freedom!

    http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=meet+john+doe+1941&hl=en&emb=0&aq=1&oq=meet+john+doe#

  • 37 Fred Sinclair // Aug 4, 2009 at 12:34 pm

    Ask your friends if they know the percentage composition of our atmosphere, especially those favoring man made global warming. http://www.nasa.gov/audience/forstudents/9-12/features/912_liftoff_atm.html

    Nitrogen (N2, 78%)
    Oxygen (O2, 21%)
    Argon (Ar, 1%)
    Water (H2O, 0 - 7%) <The TRUE Greenhouse Gas.
    Ozone (O<SUB3, 0 - 0.01%)
    Carbon Dioxide (CO2, 0.01-0.1%)

  • 38 Fred Sinclair // Aug 8, 2009 at 1:11 pm

    I've often wondered, but never understood, what was meant when someone would say "This sucks" or "That sucks".

    Now, thanks to this new ScrappleFace format, I understand it all too clearly! I know exactly, all too well, exactly what "This sucks" really means.

  • 39 ScrappleFace // Aug 8, 2009 at 1:32 pm

    Fred,
    Can you help me to understand what challenges you face with the new comment format?
    Scott

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