(2007-12-08) — A little-noticed paragraph in the latest controversial National Intelligence Estimate (NIE) on Iran’s nuclear capabilities notes that if the report’s authors are wrong in concluding that Iran ceased its nuclear weapons program in 2003, they’ll refund the cost of the report.
“We’re so confident in our findings,” wrote intelligence analyst Thomas Fingar, “that if Iran should detonate a nuclear device within the next 90-days, we’ll refund the full cost of researching and writing this report, less shipping and handling.”
Mr. Fingar said the money-back guarantee offer is designed to get the Bush administration to “give peace a chance” and to back off of its demands that Iran cease uranium enrichment and fully disclose the details of its nuclear program.
“If we’re right,” said Mr. Fingar, “the world has become a much safer place virtually overnight, no matter what the Iranian president says about wiping Israel from the map, bringing down the Great Satan America and ushering in the apocalyptic age of the 12th Imam.”
The little-known analyst added that, “And even if we’re wrong, there’s no immediate danger to the continental U.S. from missile attacks, since the Atlantic Ocean is really big and Iran’s known missiles can only reach about a dozen countries right now. In addition, it would be quite inconvenient for Iran to smuggle a suitcase nuke across, say, the Mexican border. The border crossing paperwork alone is enough of a deterrent.”
41 responses so far ↓
1 Maggie // Dec 8, 2007 at 8:59 am
Yes, and my Uncle Doggies pet goat El Stinko, doesn’t stink.
Oh,and good morning Everybody.
2 boberinyetagain // Dec 8, 2007 at 9:03 am
Hi Maggie!
Much more amusing Mr Ott! Kudos
3 Possumtrot // Dec 8, 2007 at 9:33 am
The sad fact is that Iran has had a working nuke since 2004.
You didn’t hear that here.
The next step is the border, replete with leaky tunnels.
Hold your breath. It’s coming.
4 boberinyetagain // Dec 8, 2007 at 9:37 am
Fortunately, they, like all other “nuke having” nations (ecxept one) have had the good sense not to use it. Pray that we don’t give them a reason eh?
Or they could be like Saddam who also has them but shipped them off when it was obvious he would lose the war, be captured and executed because by then, why bother?
5 conserve-a-tips // Dec 8, 2007 at 9:45 am
Ahm-a-durn-nut-job need a reason????? You are joking, right? The little weasle doesn’t need a reason. He just needs a nation. Israel.
Anybody remember his statement that Israel would be wiped from the map?
Sheesh.
6 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:02 am
I assert that using the Atom Bomb on Japan to end WWII made much, much more than “good sense” — it was the right thing to do. I also assert that it would be the right thing to do (as a last resort) to avoid WWIII.
Anybody that thinks that Ahmadinejad the Divine is sane, let alone reasonable, is seriously deluded and in need of immediate in-patient psychiatric care.
7 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:10 am
8 boberinyetagain // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:24 am
I’m just saying that since 2004 they have shown remarkable restraint given that they are mad. Apparently they have the will and the desire but have chosen not to re-draw the map.
They must really be crazy!
Leviticus 19:18
Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the Lord.
Matthew 5:39
But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.
probably kidding
9 boberinyetagain // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:47 am
the seeming fascination with war always amazes me but then i’m easily amazed i guess
10 Fred Sinclair // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:57 am
“And don’t you forget, if this parachute should fail to open properly, just bring it right back here to the Quartermaster Supply Depot for a no questions full refund.”
Heirborn Ranger
11 debass // Dec 8, 2007 at 11:28 am
Fred-
You probably remember the Maxwell House parachute-good to the last drop. Is that like buying used dynamite?
Tom Fingar-Tom Thumb. I think they are aliases for covert ops.
I still wonder if Valerie Plame gave false WMD info since that was her job at CIA which has become more CYA recently. Need another investigation.
12 Possumtrot // Dec 8, 2007 at 11:40 am
I shall be watching from afar, and the flash burn on my cheek shall be minimal.
Woe be to you unbelievers.
Thou shalt be smitten with an apocalypse undreamed by modern man.
Book of Bob; Chapter 13, Verse 666
13 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 8, 2007 at 12:20 pm
While there is little doubt amongst cognizant beings that the NIE has, over the years, done everything humanly possible to bring skepticism upon itself, the aspect at which I marvel is the one-eighty by the Leftists who now worship at the feet of a mere fragment of its text they think they saw flashed on their Wide-Screen when, just a few days ago, they vehemently derided the mere mention of the NIE with venomous alacrity.
14 onlineanalyst // Dec 8, 2007 at 12:59 pm
Will that refund be in petrodollars? I just read this morning that Iran is no longer trading its oil in dollars.
While not all agencies contributing to the NIE were in concurrence in developing this latest bombshell news, they could put their Fingar on where the discrepancies originated. The three maverick amigos from State on the committee couldn’t possibly be blinkered by political agenda, could they?
15 camojack // Dec 8, 2007 at 5:08 pm
Of course, if they prove to be mistaken, certain victims won’t be able to collect anyway…
16 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 8, 2007 at 6:20 pm
Oh, “they’ll refund the cost of the report” all right-subject to untold conditions, no doubt, and less S&H, in any event.
The bureaucrates puériles de carrière in the upper echelons of our national intelligence system need to go-enough, already. Please terminate this decades-long infinitely-looped Make-Over (à la “Groundhog Day” ) of a terminally-flawed system quivering spasmodically in its death-throes, egad-lipstick on a pig and all that…..People’s lives are at stake, good grief. Get a grip.
17 Darthmeister // Dec 8, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Money back? If Iran acquires or is able to manufacture nuclear weapons thus realizing its Islamic fundamentalist dream of being able to mass murder Jews and infidels, I’m going to demand my money back in gold or silver. Forget paper money, it won’t be worth the paper its printed on when World War IV breaks out.
I still find it amazing that the American left is more politically aligned with Iranian President Ahmadamnutjob than they are with President Bush. After all, in their world President Bush is the biggest threat to world peace, right?
Why is it liberals almost always find themselves in the same bed with Islamofascists in their opposition to the Bush Admistration? Not much different than when the Soviet evil empire was still around and American liberals were condemning President Reagan as a cowboy while giving bear hugs to the latest Russian premier. The liberals told us we must learn to co-exist with such murderous totalitarian evil and that we simply have to “understand” and realize America really wasn’t any better than the commies. But whatever their sympathies for the enemies of this country, don’t you dare “question their patriotism”!
18 Darthmeister // Dec 8, 2007 at 6:27 pm
… Ahadamnutjob nuked my comment.
19 mig // Dec 8, 2007 at 7:02 pm
I love money back gaurentees. It is so modern. It makes me want to shop. ‘Hey, Amanutjob- wanna go to the mall?’ See how easy it is to bury the hatchet and be friends. Right Booberin? Just be friendly, who can resist.
20 onlineanalyst // Dec 8, 2007 at 7:18 pm
Darth: “…while giving bear hugs to the latest Russian premier”? I just love unintentional puns.
21 onlineanalyst // Dec 8, 2007 at 7:30 pm
Even my microwave doesn’t come with such a fail-safe guarantee. Funny how the NIE can ignore repeated Iranian threats to flash sear or Vegematicize (coined word) its perceived enemies.
Over at powerlineblog, John postulates that if this assessment has been politicized, it may be so in order to remove what should be done with Iran off the debate table for the Dems.
22 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 8, 2007 at 7:36 pm
I think maybe watching those intricately-plotted, ultra-hyper-suspenseful Mission Impossible reruns on a daily basis is driving me mad.
23 MajorDomo // Dec 8, 2007 at 7:47 pm
Remember that in the world of spooks, it’s what we know that they know that we know that they know….etc. And we know that they know what we tell them. A little white lie now and then serves to make the medicine go down.
24 mig // Dec 8, 2007 at 8:06 pm
Get the Skinny
25 Fred Sinclair // Dec 8, 2007 at 9:56 pm
She will flood
your face with kisses
‘Cause you smell so
darn delicious
Oh Bama shave
Heirborn Ranger
26 Darthmeister // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:01 pm
Glad I could bring a little joy to your day ola.
From the “I Kid You Not” files:
ATLANTA (AP) - Civil rights icon Andrew Young says Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama is too young and lacks the support network to ascend to the White House.
In a media interview posted online, Young also quipped that Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton has her husband behind her, and that “Bill is every bit as black as Barack.”
“He’s probably gone with more black women than Barack,” Young said of former President Clinton, drawing laughter from a live television audience.
Of course Billy Clinton was America’s first black president with an Arkansas hillbilly upbringing. A true renaissance man by most liberals’ accounting. Can’t wait until Clinton operatives start their whisper campaign that Barack is only half-black and has never really been “down for the struggle.”
27 Darthmeister // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:05 pm
… oh wait, they started the campaign about six months ago right after Biden’s remark about
OsamaObama being an “African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.” Of course in the liberal universe Mr. Biden isn’t a racist. But let anyone else who isn’t a liberal say that …28 Fred Sinclair // Dec 8, 2007 at 10:36 pm
Dec., 7th came and went without so much as a whimper. Not a word all day on TV and radio. Or, if there was - I missed it. For those too young to remember - or are too old to care.
Shortly after the attack on December 7, 1941 and America’s entry in to the war, one of the first and the most classic World War Two patriotic songs was written by Don Reid and music by Reid and Sammy Kaye.
The song, “Remember Pearl Harbor”; described as a “March with spirit”, was based on the popular saying of the day and became an instant hit with the public. It was played by every radio station and enthusiasticaly sung at every social, family and religious gatherings across the country.
“Remember Pearl Harbor”, the song and the saying, went in to history as the quintessential slogan and battle cry of World War II.
The Song
History - in every century,
records an act that lives forevermore.
We’ll recall - as in to line we fall,
the thing that happened on Hawaii’s shore.
Let’s REMEMBER PEARL HARBOR -
As we go to meet the foe -
Let’s REMEMBER PEARL HARBOR
As we did the Alamo.
We will always remember -
how they died for liberty,
Let’s REMEMBER PEARL HARBOR
and go on to victory.
Heirborn Ranger
29 Ms RightWing, Ink // Dec 9, 2007 at 9:51 am
re:24
Mig
I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at the statistics where my bunker lies. It is a 90 percent Democratic town and it sure shows it. Poverty stricken, uneducated and rather stupid, that’s us. Plus we get more free lunches at our schools than surrounding districts.
Don’t do that to me again. I have to live here you know
30 conserve-a-tips // Dec 9, 2007 at 11:20 am
Good morning everybody. The weather is really bad and the lights are flickering, so I am not sure how long we are with heat. It is icing right now with a prediction of up to an inch of ice. If we get that, we will be in the dark for a week. The trees already have about a 1/4″ so far and it is coming down at a steady clip. Anybody got a recipe for sterno????? I am worried about the daughter who has no fireplace. You would think that she would have prepared, but she’s in college. What else can I say?
And Mig, thanks for that link. It was really interesting.
Onlineanalyst: If this has been politicized, somebody needs to face charges of treason.
31 Ms RightWing, Ink // Dec 9, 2007 at 1:23 pm
conserve-a-tips
Some folks that huddle around heating grates on the streets of our fine cities say Sterno taste good straight from the can
32 Ms RightWing, Ink // Dec 9, 2007 at 1:23 pm
pushing through the ice (of which we have here also)
33 onlineanalyst // Dec 9, 2007 at 2:50 pm
The dreaded iceman cometh. Don’t freeze me, bro! (Back in the day when I commuted to work, the rain/sleet/ice/snow combination was the worst for white-knuckle driving. We so often forget to count our blessings of dependable electricity and all of the goodies supported through it until downed lines put us into a vulnerable position.)
OT: I see that Madame Hillary is bringing her “softer side” on view for Iowans and New Hampshirites by recruiting Mom Rodham (88) and Chelsea to join her on the campaign trail. Isn’t that special?
/snark
34 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 9, 2007 at 5:56 pm
I am not Muslim nor Catholic nor am I even Iraqi, but this from Power Line makes me want to say, “Hallelu Yah!” or something.
“Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
“You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.” ~~Romans 5:3-6 [emphasis mine]
Merry Christmas Everybody!
35 gafisher // Dec 9, 2007 at 9:35 pm
Mig Re#24: My town came up in rags — highest poverty, lowest home ownership, worst unemployment, lowest percentage of married residents and so on for miles around, maybe all this side of the state. Dismal prospects for an area that really doesn’t seem all that bad a place to live.
Then I realized those figures actually reflect the fact this is a University town; 85% of our population comes here to be educated, then goes out to change the world, leaving only their statistics behind. (Well, that and a hundred grand or so.) But I have to wonder how those stats affect us.
36 gafisher // Dec 9, 2007 at 9:50 pm
JL3 Re#34: Encouraging news. It’s ironic that Christians in Iraq had more freedom under Saddam than over the past few years — apparently some of our vaunted Diplomatic Corpse thought the Iraqis were just “naturally Muslim” and sort of forgot the Christian population there (much as the MSM and the Left thought Iraqis were either incapable or unworthy of democracy).
I just hope the Vatican doesn’t send Bishop Tiny Muskins over there to run things …
37 Libby Gone // Dec 10, 2007 at 6:43 am
Can I buy the Lifetime Service Agreement that the Israelis recommend? In case “I ran” into problems?
38 Ms RightWing, Ink // Dec 10, 2007 at 9:02 am
Another sad situation that was stopped by an armed person before this nutjob could kill more innocent victims
***********************************************
“The church’s 11 a.m. service had recently ended, and hundreds of people were milling about when the gunman opened fire. Nearby were parents picking up their children from the nursery.
Police arrived to find that the gunman had been killed by a member of the church’s armed security staff, Myers said.
”There was a courageous staff member who probably saved many lives here today,” Myers said.”
39 JQ // Dec 10, 2007 at 10:33 am
Boberin-
The Scriptures you selectively quoted were in regards to personal interactions between individuals. We’re not talking about forgiving a thief or even breaking up a bar room brawl; we’re talking about stopping a nation bent on domination through any means necessary. Here are some more appropriate verses for you:
“Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man.” -Genesis 9:6
“For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you. For he is God’s servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God’s servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.” -Romans 13:3,4
Before you take this as my endorsement of citizens killing others in the name of God, remember that both of these statements are in reference to governing authorities executing justice, not vengeful citizens carrying out vendettas.
In a perfect world of rainbows and unicorns dancing hand in hand, there would be no need for a governing authority to take lives. Unfortunately, Japan was actively committing war crimes that were at least as atrocious as those committed by the Germans, and they were ready to fight to the bitter end. We have demonized Hitler and his Nazis all through history (rightly so), while Japan’s crimes have been quietly swept under the rug, perhaps as an apology for the bombs. The unfortunate by-product of that forgiveness is that all people remember are the bombs. They have forgotten that there was a reason that such a horrific show of force was necessary.
40 JQ // Dec 10, 2007 at 10:48 am
[I've been having trouble posting of late, so I hope this comment gets through...]
Boberin-
The Scriptures you selectively quoted were in regards to personal interactions between individuals. We’re not talking about forgiving a thief or even breaking up a bar room brawl; we’re talking about stopping a nation bent on domination through any means necessary. Here are some more appropriate verses for you:
“Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man.” -Genesis 9:6
“For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you. For he is God’s servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God’s servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.” -Romans 13:3,4
Before you take this as my endorsement of citizens killing others in the name of God, remember that both of these statements are in reference to governing authorities executing justice, not vengeful citizens carrying out vendettas.
In a perfect world of rainbows and unicorns dancing hand in hand, there would be no need for a governing authority to take lives. Unfortunately, Japan was actively committing war crimes that were at least as atrocious as those committed by the Germans, and they were ready to fight to the bitter end. We have demonized Hitler and his Nazis all through history (rightly so), while Japan’s crimes have been quietly swept under the rug, perhaps as an apology for the bombs. The unfortunate by-product of that forgiveness is that all people remember are the bombs. They have forgotten that there was a reason that such a horrific show of force was necessary.
41 Ms RightWing, Ink // Dec 10, 2007 at 12:24 pm
zip
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