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China Recalls Hillary Clinton's Asbestos Pantsuit

by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · 41 Comments · · Print This Story Print This Story

(2007-11-16) — Chinese authorities today announced a sweeping recall of garments manufactured with asbestos, including the pantsuit worn by Sen. Hillary Clinton during last night’s Democrat presidential debate.

Sen. Clinton’s trousers were marketed mostly through retailers in the Washington D.C. region, and made from “a political-grade fabric that provides protection from spontaneous combustion, thus avoiding the embarrassment of ‘pants on fire’.”

Because asbestos is the leading cause of lung cancer in laboratory mice and rats, experts said it posed a particular danger to Sen. Clinton’s rivals on the stage last night.

The Chinese government apologized to the former First Lady for shipping the flame-retardant slacks, and said she could either return them for a refund, or try asbestos abatement through dry cleaning.

A spokesman for the Clinton campaign said the candidate had no worries, “because Hillary has a lot of friends in Chinatown who are experts at laundering things, and would love to contribute to her campaign in any way they can.”

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Tags: Politics

41 responses so far ↓

  • 1 MargeinMI // Nov 16, 2007 at 7:45 am

    “pants on fire” hmmmmmm what comes before that? Oh yeah. LIAR LIAR! Bwahahahahaha.

    Scott, you’re awesome!

    Morning all. And

    God Bless America!

  • 2 egospeak // Nov 16, 2007 at 7:47 am

    Scott,

    You are truly warped. Another classic. How do you keep doing this?

    Regards,

  • 3 egospeak // Nov 16, 2007 at 8:21 am

    ET, one final comment,

    In my estimation, the people you associated with who so strenuously opposed FDR’s New Deal were prescient. They understood human nature and the nature of government.

    Regards from your pal,

  • 4 Hawkeye // Nov 16, 2007 at 8:37 am

    “Hillary has a lot of friends in Chinatown who are experts at laundering things…”

    Wow, what a GREAT line… I love it Scott. Thanks :lol:

  • 5 mig // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:00 am

    This is so funny, I just don’t sleep well unless I get my dose of Ott. Ah, life is good.

  • 6 The American Street » Blog Archive » Finally, the impressions of the Democratic debate really matter // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:02 am

    [...] Scrappleface has TEH funny. [...]

  • 7 mig // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:08 am

    Other rats on stage… hardy har har.

  • 8 Maggie // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:30 am

    Hillary’s asbestos pants suit shielded her from the sparks directed at her in last night’s debate.
    Did you notice all of the’ booing’ when anything was said against Hill. Plants,maybe?……Nah….couldn’t be?

  • 9 da Bunny // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:53 am

    Scott, you are so brilliantly funny it’s almost scary! Just when we think you can’t get any better…you DO!! :-)

  • 10 woodnwheel // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:56 am

    I wholeheartedly agree with my fellow Scrapplers, Scott, especially with regard to the “pants on fire” paragraph :)

  • 11 diamond jim // Nov 16, 2007 at 10:55 am

    Scott is ‘da man with the pan (of Clint-an)

  • 12 Libby Gone // Nov 16, 2007 at 11:10 am

    Scott, sir,
    Truly funny! Very Good!

  • 13 gafisher // Nov 16, 2007 at 11:29 am

    Maggie Re#8: With Hillary there’s a danger of “Plants on Fire”.

    At least Wulfie followed his script.

  • 14 Libby Gone // Nov 16, 2007 at 11:35 am

    With all of the “mud slinging” hopefully she had the pantsuit ScotchGuarded.

  • 15 Libby Gone // Nov 16, 2007 at 11:36 am

    Ted Kennelldy ‘hic’ can help guard the Scotch!

  • 16 Ms RightWing, Ink // Nov 16, 2007 at 11:42 am

    I don’t care who you are, this story is funny, no, hilarious

  • 17 Fred Sinclair // Nov 16, 2007 at 12:01 pm

    “…who are experts at laundering things….” was the line that got me.

    Scott, are you even aware of how seriously dangerous you are?

    Heirborn Ranger

  • 18 Fred Sinclair // Nov 16, 2007 at 12:17 pm

    ot - So they got a bill through requiring the President’s signature 15 days in advance of any relief action, now it may be that “None Dare Call It Treason”, but I will.

    “When in the course of human events it becomes necessary……” It may come to Civil War, But instead of the North against the South………….. ..it will be the Americans against the Communists.

    For the most part they don’t know they are Communists (at least most of them don’t) they see themselves as being masters of the “Cradle to Grave” government. Wherein their superiority is required to keep everyone else in line as in “Father Knows Best”. Friedrich Engels, Karl Marx & Vladimir Ilich Lenin were right all along, in their opinion. The problems they faced was that there never was the “correct” people to implement their ideas.

    This concept, overlooked man’s inherent evil nature. All men are created equal, it’s just that some are more equal than others. This resulted in Joseph Stalin and Adolph Hitler rising to power to rightfully control every aspect of “the people’s lives”. Castro and Chavez merely followed their example.

    Reid, Pelosi, Levin, etc. aren’t crazy; they are following the template. Honestly believing that “They” are empowered with the superiority necessary to break Communism’s 100% failure rate, since they “know how to do it right”.

    Once they’ve convinced themselves of their destiny - that they were “born to rule”. Johnston had Kennedy removed, Clinton will do whatever necessary to assume power and then make Stalin look like a Sunday School teacher by comparison as she then will stop at nothing to maintain that power.

    I would not like to be Obama today, if he is honestly deemed by her to be a viable threat to her Presidency, he might encounter an unforeseen ‘problem’.

    Heirborn Ranger

    PS: I doubt Harry’s ability to get Bush’s veto over-ridden. fs

  • 19 Darthmeister // Nov 16, 2007 at 1:52 pm

    Asbestos pant suit, eh?

    Well, if sHrillary is able to lie and buy her way into the presidency, maybe we should start calling her “ol’ lead bottom” … abestos pantsuit notwithstanding.

    BTW, does anyone in their right mind actually think this woman is capable of leading America much less a ghost town?

  • 20 Darthmeister // Nov 16, 2007 at 1:53 pm

    I wonder if Wolf Blitzer go his private parts back from Hillary’s lockbox yet?

  • 21 gafisher // Nov 16, 2007 at 2:06 pm

    Come to think of it, asbestos was her only choice. She couldn’t afford to jeopardize the illegal immigrant vote by wearing NoMex.

  • 22 gafisher // Nov 16, 2007 at 2:14 pm

    Darth Re#19: Lead and drag are just differing views of the same event. If Hillary gets into the driver’s seat, we’ll be chained to the bumper.

  • 23 everthink // Nov 16, 2007 at 4:31 pm

    Prescient?

    They also thought water fluoridation was part of a communist mind control plot!

    You all don’t still believe that do you?

  • 24 Darthmeister // Nov 16, 2007 at 4:45 pm

    Hmmmm, neverthink has escaped his straitjacket again.

    Hey Scott, isn’t it about time for another Zawahiri Christmas Greeting Video? Or maybe a jihadist Thanksgiving Video where they’re howling how they’ve won in Iraq because the Democrats here in America see “the truth” of their great Islamic victory … Allah be thanked!

  • 25 mindknumbed kid // Nov 16, 2007 at 6:09 pm

    I particularly like the “political-grade fabric” line, what a wonderful invention that the Chinese stole…..

    Fred, I somehow get the idear that the individual libs do not neccessarily view themselves as being superior. They think they are good servants of the people, but I think the majic pill is in the good of Government, not the flawed one we have, the one they invision. I guess maybe they can’t see the difference between fantasy and reality.
    The man of a woman’s dreams doesn’t have stinky feet, never farts, or leaves the toilet seat up because they see him as being “perfect” (but in reality there is only one me). The same must be true of their dream government, they fail to see the flaws therein, therefore they do not exist.They desire the perfect form of government and they see it, it is in their mind’s eye and therefore collectively all of their correct minded colleages can bring it to be. I believe they think it won’t have the flaws of the other socialist/communist regimes because they see it as not having any. They are that naive, I believe it.

    Anyone seen the c-a-t today ?

  • 26 mindknumbed kid // Nov 16, 2007 at 6:28 pm

    Of course I didn’t attempt to endure the dems on parade last night, but it sounds to me as though it came off as a resusitation of sHrillary, the least capable person to ever attempt to become the leader of the free world. As I predicted, the LSM is going to do all they can to aid in her coronation.
    Maybe they have spent so many years fantasizing her in office that they aren’t going to allow themselves to be critical enough of her to slow her ascension much, if any.
    It’s their version of don’t ask,don’t tell.

  • 27 mindknumbed kid // Nov 16, 2007 at 6:48 pm

    push ?

  • 28 everthink // Nov 16, 2007 at 8:29 pm

    “Of course I didn’t attempt to endure the dems on parade last night, … ”

    The parade wasn’t last night, it’s still a year from now. Do come.

    Say, do you think Rudy’s past is going to be a problem?

    ET

  • 29 mindknumbed kid // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:34 pm

    Oh come now, didn’t the B. Clinton campaign teach you that the past is not important? All that matters is the future and the children…..

    I guess we could skip the whole year and just fast forward to the elections.

  • 30 gafisher // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:39 pm

    ET Re#28: “Say, do you think Rudy’s past is going to be a problem?”

    Good point, and an important question. Who will be able to match him for experience in running a good-sized government under direct terrorist attack? I suspect his past will be a big problem for Hillary and the rest.

  • 31 Ms RightWing, Ink // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:39 pm

    So does this mean Kerry will release his military records. And if he is so darn rich why doesn’t he use his own money or has his wife put it in a lock box

    http://www.in-forum.com/ap/index.cfm?page=view&id=D8SV3LL85

    Maybe he is using the tactics of white supremacists who say the murder of millions of Jews never happened

  • 32 gafisher // Nov 16, 2007 at 9:43 pm

    Darth Re#20: In the future Wulfie will be much more careful when he thinks he hears Mrs. Clinton offer to hold his spectacles for him …

  • 33 mindknumbed kid // Nov 16, 2007 at 10:43 pm

    gafisher Re#32 - Ho ho,ha ha,he he !! Good one!

    Re #30 - I think the libs ought to be more concerned about sHrillary’s past…..I keep hearing polls that indicate she has a high percentage of unfavorable opinion out there.

  • 34 MajorDomo // Nov 17, 2007 at 12:16 am

    FS #18 “This concept, overlooked man’s inherent evil nature. ”

    Do you not know that man is inherently “good”? And therefore he requires laws to make him be evil? At least, that’s what the libs tell me.

  • 35 Darthmeister // Nov 17, 2007 at 5:39 am

    gafisher,

    I hear Volfie baby is writing his memoirs. To be titled - From Metrosexual to Media Castrati: How I Had It Handed To Me.

  • 36 Darthmeister // Nov 17, 2007 at 5:54 am

    CNN lies again. After describing certain questioners at the Dhimmiecrat debate as “independents” or “undecided voters”, it turns out several of the questioners are well connected to the Dhimmiecrat Party. And this coming after the debacle where Clinton handlers gave softball questions to student plants.

    Here’s just one look at the issue. Details still developing as conservative bloggers run this story to the ground. The lie is so blatant even the moonbats at DailyKos have made note … but after visiting their site it turns out they’re upset because the questions weren’t left-wing enough. They see Kookcinich as mainstream and Clinton/Edwards/Obama as too far to the right.

    BTW, American voters should keep in mind if they elect any of the Dhimmiecrat candidates (except Joe Biden who doesn’t have a snowball’s chance anyway) to the White House, a closet commie will be appointing the next two Supreme Court justices over the next four years.

  • 37 mig // Nov 17, 2007 at 8:07 am

    There was a time, it seems like an ancient myth now, when the editorial boards of great newspapers were held in high regard. August opinion-makers, the newspaper editorial board counciled the masses with the educated and informed judgments of the wise. Today, as intelligence and instruction decline, as the new media trumps the old, and McPapers offer Mcpinions in sound bites and graphs, the opportunity for sober and refined editorials has a new moment. Alas, the great papers of old, the major city dailies and papers of record are found pathetically wanting.
    By Andrew Sumereau

  • 38 mig // Nov 17, 2007 at 12:12 pm

    If a CEO of a fortune 500 company were to retire, would anyone seriously consider his wife to be an adequate replacement simply because she was married to him when he ran the company? What about a Super Bowl winning football team? What do you think the reaction of their fans would be if their coach’s wife was being seriously discussed as his replacement?

    It sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it? Yet, Hillary Clinton has practically been anointed by the press and the punditocracy as our next President, despite the fact that her run at the presidency is almost entirely based on being Bill Clinton’s wife.

    By John Hawkins

  • 39 Ms RightWing, Ink // Nov 17, 2007 at 2:39 pm

    zip

  • 40 mindknumbed kid // Nov 17, 2007 at 9:13 pm

    No, being Bill’s wife an unrestrained abition.

  • 41 mindknumbed kid // Nov 18, 2007 at 5:01 pm

    and ——-ambition

    never try to post when you are being pressed to do more important things.

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