(2006-11-16) — More than 200 Sony PlayStation fans, waiting outside a Best Buy store in San Jose, California, were virtually annihilated today, according to a 911 call, by one gamer determined to be among the first to own the new PS3 console.
Police cordoned off the perimeter of the parking lot as the search began for a man in his early twenties who reportedly “blasted the heads off” of dozens of customers as they sat on the sidewalk waiting for the store to open.
Although no bodies or blood could be found at the scene, police played a recorded 911 call in which the voice of a young man says, “I got him! I got him! Die you bloody maggot! You think you got here first? Oh yeah? Why don’t you tell that to my friends, Smith and Wesson.”
The agitated caller’s words were punctuated by blasting sounds.
Best Buy and Sony spokesmen refused comment on the incident, and police have impounded the suspect’s couch as the search continues.
“The public should use great caution in approaching this man,” an unnamed police spokesman said, “as he is probably pretending to be armed and imagining that he’s dangerous.”
34 responses so far ↓
1 JamesonLewis3rd // Nov 16, 2006 at 7:55 pm
God Bless America!
2 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 7:57 pm
Oh goody. Am I first? God bless America but forget that PS3.
3 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 7:57 pm
Dag nabit.
4 RedPepper // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:00 pm
Hi there, JL3 & c-a-t!
R U ready 2 play?
5 JamesonLewis3rd // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:12 pm
I had a Nintendo, back in the day.
These days, I’m content to shoot Nazis or aliens (from outer space, that is) here on my PC.
Or Mah-Jongg or pool online.
6 RedPepper // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:26 pm
JL3: I’ve drained my online pool for the winter … (gets a mite chilly up here, y’know!)
7 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:29 pm
Redpepper - I am assuming that you are referring to Monday Night Football. Are U ready fer sum foootballll. Are U ready to paarrttyy..
PlayStation 2 for Dummies: Tiddly Winks.
As you can tell, I am not impressed by this game that has every mom and dad acting like starving people in Russia standing in line for their one loaf of bread. Sad. Sad. Sad.
8 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:30 pm
Redpepper, I would think that you could turn it into a skating rink and charge admission!
9 RedPepper // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:33 pm
c-a-t: Actually, I’m channeling the ghost of Vladimer Nabakov.
“Quine the swine! Guilty of killing Quilty! Oh, Lolita! I have only words to play with!”
10 camojack // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:39 pm
Virtual[ly indistinguishable from] reality?
11 RedPepper // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:47 pm
“Where are the trolls?
It’s our turn to gloat!
Jack Murtha’s a goner
His Swift boat won’t float!
So where are the trolls?
There ought to be trolls!”
12 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 8:55 pm
Redpepper, ah that kids today had only words to play with. What might their minds become? Certainly not the mush that they are plagued with today!
Playstation3.13 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 9:10 pm
Redpepper: (to the tune of Send In the Clowns)
Isn’t it rich?
It isn’t fair.
The Dems step on their ethics.
No trolls- anywhere.
Where are the trolls?
Something’s amiss
Don’t you agree?
They were just here on this blog
Just as rank as can be.
Where are the trolls?
We want the trolls.
Just when we catch their pants down,
Finally seeing the Dems as they actually are,
They make their ethics a joke with their usual flair,
Sure to implode.
Don’t the trolls care?
Don’t you love farce?
They do it well.
I thought the trolls would appear to discuss
Demi’s Hell.
But where are the trolls?
Quick, send in the trolls.
Never mind. We don’t care.
14 gafisher // Nov 16, 2006 at 9:20 pm
“…pretending to be armed and imagining that he’s dangerous.”
Sounds like John Kerry going in to a debate.
15 mig // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:05 pm
Do you know the way to San Jose?
I’ve been away so long I might go wrong and lose my way?
I’ve got lots of friends in San Jose.
I’m going back to find some piece of mind San Jose
16 Darthmeister // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:11 pm
Actually Mr. Colt would have been a better choice when it comes to informal introductions.
17 Ms RightWing, Ink // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:17 pm
Ah for the good ol’ [gay ol’] days when we “ALL” sat around and watched the Flinstones and Charlie Weaver and didn’t have a Play Station to practice blood and gore on.
P.S. Thanks to all of you who sent Mt Idy thought vibes my way before my brain crashed and burned.
A good CW line. “Mom said the bathroom caught fire and did a lot of damage. Good thing it wasn’t connected to the house.”
18 mig // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:21 pm
CAT -
try this link? Your talents could take you to nationals.
http://www.amiright.com/
19 mig // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:24 pm
This from the link:
The store manager told them to keep the place clean and left the light on for them overnight, he said. The group — now an ad-hoc community — also is conducting a roll call every four hours to make sure everyone still has their places. People are taking turns to go get food or grab a shower.
Now That is a America.
20 Tinman // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:35 pm
I’m still waiting in line for Atari.
21 conserve-a-tips // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:42 pm
Mig, that site is hillarious. Did you read the one called Supertelevangelistic Sex-and-Drugs Psychosis?
I am sick from laughing so hard. Thank you so much for the fun.
22 RedPepper // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:47 pm
#13 c-a-t: Bravo! Bravissimo!
High five!
23 Darthmeister // Nov 16, 2006 at 10:59 pm
More I-kid-you-not-headlines:
WAL-MART says critic Sen. John Edwards sought PlayStation 3 — at WAL-MART!
One more anti-capitalist liberal hypocrite. Buwahahahaha.
Lawyer argues sex with dead deer not crime…
Has to be a liberal.
Voodoo Practitioner Tries to Jinx Bush…Iran says about to take ‘final step’ in atomic plan…
And the free world is still in denial.
Dixie Chicks Say USA Is Spitting in Their Faces
Well, what do you expect when you spit in the faces of your American fans? Shut up and sing if you don’t want your fans abandoning you when you use your stage as a soapbox. Sheesh.
24 Darthmeister // Nov 16, 2006 at 11:03 pm
That is a hilarious site, mig. Very well written. Too bad Haggard compromised himself and now has made himself a legitimate target for such spoofs.
25 Possumtrot // Nov 16, 2006 at 11:17 pm
God created all men equal; Samuel Colt made them even more equal.
When I win at solitaire on my computer, I’m still trying to figure out how to make the money come out of that ATM [A:drive] slot on the front of the infernal thing.
So much for video games.
Re: previous thread: Yes, Liger, the medications are working quite nicely. My temper and delusions are under control, and I’m hiding and watching to see what those zany politicians will do next. I can’t wait for “The Plan” to take effect. Uncle Joe Stalin had lots of five-year plans, if I read my history correctly. 30,000,000 Russians died, but hey, you gots to break eggs to make an omlette.
Peace out, Bubba.
Live from Scorpion Hill…
26 R.A.M. // Nov 17, 2006 at 1:18 am
Before the bullets started flying, the suspect was heard to say,
“I know what you are thinking, did I get in line before you, or you before me? Well, in all the confusion, I’ve kind of lost track! So then you have to ask yourself a question. Do I feel lucky?
Well do ya punks?”
27 Possumtrot // Nov 17, 2006 at 3:35 am
I feel so lucky!
All I have to do is run over people with my wheelchair, and all my cyber-fantasies will be fulfilled.
Then it’s all about stealing a high-powered car, running fom the cops, and going postal with a firearm.
Real life isn’t so crazed. I had the high-horsepower; I always pulled over and sat docile at the curb when I got nailed for speeding.
After one owns a 400-horsepower sports car, video games are nothing. Stand in line for what?
28 MargeinMI // Nov 17, 2006 at 8:13 am
Looking for PS2 on sale before the Holiday.
My kingdom for a working CD drive! I soooo miss my 3D Maze Man Winter Wonderland! (Cheap rip off of PacMan) I’d FINALLY broke 600,000-don’t ask me how.
:o(
29 seneuba // Nov 17, 2006 at 8:46 am
Please….gimme back my 1979 Asteroids game…I miss driving my little triangle around turning big rocks into little ones.
30 Just Ranting // Nov 17, 2006 at 12:35 pm
Anyone for a game of Pong?
31 antodav // Nov 17, 2006 at 3:09 pm
Bah. PS3. Why would I want to dish out $600 for a video game system? I’ve been a (mostly) loyal Nintendonian all of my life, and I’m getting the Wii instead of the PS3…it’s only $250, and it’s far more innovative, instead of packed with a bunch of non-game-related junk that nobody except the most fanatical PlayStation fans really needs.
32 mig // Nov 17, 2006 at 9:54 pm
http://www.break.com/index/guy_smashes_brand_new_ps3.html
Oh brother!
33 R.A.M. // Nov 18, 2006 at 3:14 am
Scott Ott,
You are better than Jean Dixon!
You predicted this!
34 mig // Nov 18, 2006 at 7:46 am
Another botched ‘joke’ by the dems. It was all a big mistake, http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/11/16/D8LEJIOO0.html
asked his local Wal- Mart store for help in getting the potential 2008 presidential candidate a Sony PlayStation 3. Edwards said a volunteer did so by mistake.
Edwards told The Associated Press that the volunteer “feels terrible” about seeking the game unit at Wal-Mart a day after his boss criticized the company, saying it doesn’t treat its employees fairly.
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