(2006-07-24) — After learning that the battle between Israel and Hezbollah could have been prevented if Sen. John Kerry, D-MA, had been the U.S. Commander in Chief, President George Bush today dispatched Sen. Kerry to the war-torn region to “get this thing solved.”
Sen. Kerry, a career Vietnam veteran, who told a political gathering in Detroit yesterday that “we must destroy Hezbollah” and that the president “has been absent on diplomacy“, said he would bring his own brand of “diplomatic destruction” to the terrorist group.
“Senator Kerry’s presence and intellect alone should bring a swift end to hostilities,” said Mr. Bush, who admitted that he, and the State Department, had “kind of put the Middle East thing on the back burner” while following televised coverage of the Tour de France bicycle race.
In related news, as hostilities along the Lebanon border approached the two-week mark, the crisis was officially added to the list of “bad things that would not have happened during a John Kerry presidency.”
10 responses so far ↓
1 Old War Dogs // Jul 24, 2006 at 7:43 am
Bush Sends Kerry to Solve Israel-Hezbollah War
(2006-07-24) — After learning that the battle between Israel and Hezbollah could have been prevented if Sen. John Kerry, D-MA, had been the U.S. Commander in Chief, President George Bush today dispatched Sen. Kerry to the war-torn region to get
2 Inoperable Terran » Taking him at his word // Jul 24, 2006 at 10:03 am
[...] Scott Ott knows what Bush should do about Kerry. Posted by Ian S. in [...]
3 Hot Air » Blog Archive » Kerry: I can control the wind and the waves and Iran’s terrorists // Jul 24, 2006 at 11:36 am
[...] Update: Bush sends Kerry to the rescue! [...]
4 NoisyRoom.net » Blog Archive » Kerry: I can control the wind and the waves and Iran’s terrorists // Jul 24, 2006 at 12:44 pm
[...] Update: Bush sends Kerry to the rescue! [link] [...]
5 Moonage Political Webdream // Jul 24, 2006 at 1:07 pm
Politicizing the Middle East
The Democrats were slow to jump on the Middle East crisis bandwagon, but they’ve more than made up for it: Bill Clinton - “grab a rifle, get in a ditch and fight and die†for Israel. Howard Dean - “If
6 RightWinged.com // Jul 24, 2006 at 2:45 pm
Kerry On Mideast Violence: “If I was president, this wouldn’t have happened”
Partially cross-posted at Expose the Left Only a week ago we were mocking Howard Dean for his claim that the current Middle East crisis wouldn’t be taking place under Democratic leadership, but it seems the competition for idiot of the…
7 Don Surber // Jul 24, 2006 at 10:49 pm
The Nose On Your Face vs. Scrappleface
The political satire wars heat up!
8 :: Political Musings :: » John Kerry, Still Not President // Jul 24, 2006 at 10:51 pm
[...] Scrappleface has a pretty good take on Kerry and his endless non-sequiturs: [...]
9 The Volokh Conspiracy // Jul 25, 2006 at 2:07 am
Kerry to Solve Middle East War.-
Scrappleface reports that John Kerry is going to end the Middle East War, which wouldn’t have happened if Kerry had been elected …
10 Searchlight Crusade // Jul 25, 2006 at 1:00 pm
Links and Minifeatures 07 25 Tuesday
RINO Sightings recommended: Politechnical (the nature of p…
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