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Gore: Save Earth, Chop Methane-Making Trees

by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · 11 Comments · · Print This Story Print This Story

(2006-01-12) — New research, published in the journal Nature, indicating that plants produce 10-to-30 percent of the methane that causes global warming, sparked former Vice President Al Gore today to call for clear-cutting the Amazon rainforests in order to “save Mother Earth from these silent, but deadly, methane merchants.”

Mr. Gore’s 1992 book, ‘Earth in the Balance‘ (currently the 99,049th best seller at Amazon.com), raised a clarion call and mobilized a generation to save the rainforests that he’s now committed to leveling.

The man behind the invention of the Internet, and the red-hot Current TV network, noted that two other recent studies show …
1) planting trees sucks water from the ground, drying up streams and leeching soil of essential nutrients, and
2) cutting air pollution could trigger a surge in global warming, because particles in the atmosphere reflect radiation back into space

“Science now tells us,” Mr. Gore said, “that the only way to save Mother Earth is to slaughter her parasitic, methane-spewing rainforests, and burn them to enhance our radiation shield.”

Mr. Gore said he would soon launch a new grassroots campaign to “stop heartless corporations like Weyerhaeuser” that he accuses of “wholesale re-forestation of our precious clear-cut lands.”

The only elected president who didn’t serve a day in the office, Mr. Gore said, “You have to go where the evidence leads. I’m putting the ‘mental’ back into environmentalism, and building a bridge to the 22nd century out of 100-percent virgin-forest hardwoods.”

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Tags: Science

11 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Decision ‘08 » Blog Archive » Thursday Night Quick Shots // Jan 12, 2006 at 10:21 pm

    [...] More on the death of Kyoto from Tim Blair and ScrappleFace… [...]

  • 2 StrangeThingsAfoot.com » // Jan 14, 2006 at 10:22 am

    [...] Scrapple Face says Al Gore has a new environmental agenda. Now this is funny! [...]

  • 3 CaNN :: We started it. // Jan 17, 2006 at 7:55 am

    [...] SCRAPPLEFACE: “Gore: Save Earth, Chop Methane-Making Trees” …. (scrappleface) No Comments so far Leave a comment RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI Leave a comment Line and paragraph breaks automatic, e-mail address never displayed, HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong> [...]

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