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Korean Stem-Cell Study Promises Cure for Lying

by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · 4 Comments · · Print This Story Print This Story

(2005-12-23) — New stem-cell research promises “miraculous cures” for humans afflicted with a genetic predisposition to unethical behavior, according to Hwang Woo-suk, South Korea’s top scientist, who yesterday resigned his university job after admitting that he faked data in another study which had raised hopes of new cures for hard-to-treat diseases.

A panel investigating Mr. Hwang’s stem cell cloning study discovered that he had produced 11 lines of apparently-cloned stem cells through a technique that bypassed the cloning process, and simply placed two sets of cells in separate test tubes, with one set labeled as “cloned cells.”

Undeterred by the loss of his job, his credibility, and most likely his $5 million per year in government funding, Mr. Hwang announced today that he is just months away from a cure for a condition in the human heart that causes the kind of deception that destroyed his career.

“Clearly, I’m a victim of this genetic flaw,” said Mr. Hwang. “Rather than wallow in self pity, I will dedicate myself to giving hope to the millions of people born each year with what I call Spurious Inclination Neuropathy. We must place our faith and trust in stem cell research to relieve the untold suffering caused by this congenital defect.”

Mr. Hwang said he would immediately write a paper for the journal Science, outlining his latest breakthrough, then return to the laboratory to assemble the data that best supports his conclusions.

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Tags: Science

4 responses so far ↓

  • 1 basil's blog // Dec 23, 2005 at 7:25 am

    Breakfast 12-23-2005

    Interesting posts I found while perusing my blogroll:

  • 2 TMH's Bacon Bits // Dec 23, 2005 at 8:47 am

    Korean ES Cell Research Article Retracted

    Is it just me, or is it quite ironic that, so close to the eve of our celebration of the virgin birth of Jesus the Christ, scientists coveting similar godlike creation power would fall so far from grace?

  • 3 The Business of America is Business // Dec 24, 2005 at 4:12 am

    Roe v. Hwang

    The last few days have seen a major story break, one that will reverberate through scientific, academic, and corporate circles for years. Here’s one headline I picked up via Drudge: “South Korean researcher Hwang Woo-suk faked results of at…

  • 4 Breakfast 12-23-2005 « Basil’s Blog // Jul 30, 2009 at 8:42 pm

    [...] ScrappleFace says Korea is on to a cure [...]

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