(2018-08-13) — Recent news reports that archaeologists have discovered Homo erectus went extinct because the species used “least-effort strategies” — in other words they were lazy — fail to tell the whole story, according to social scientists who examined the data.

While the findings from Australian National University at a dig site in Saudi Arabia indicate Homo erectus did “the bare minimum to get by,” neglected to plan, and used whatever he could find near camp, more enterprising and industrious species like Neanderthal and Homo sapiens would literally climb any mountain, and ford any stream to find the tools to survive, and even to thrive.

However, that conclusion demonstrates what sociologists call “survivor bias.”

“It’s not because erectus was lazy that his kind died out,” said an unnamed noted social scientist. “Neanderthal and Homo sapiens actually stole all of the resources, and then refused to lift a finger to help erectus. If those ancient Republicans had merely redistributed what they unfairly acquired, erectus might have overcome the institutional oppression that led to his extinction.”