(2003-12-22) -- The U.S. Supreme Court is set to rule, in early 2004, that most of the 1st Amendment to the Constitution is unconstitutional, according to an unnamed Court clerk.

The nation's highest court will likely amend the 1st amendment contained in the so-called "Bill of Rights," eliminating everything but the first five words.

Currently, the 1st amendment states, "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

However, the unnamed Supreme Court clerk said, "In light of some recent federal court rulings, a majority of the justices have come to believe that only the first five words of the amendment really make sense. Eliminating the rest should reduce intolerance and dissent in our country, making us truly one nation under mandamus."

The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) said it has a team of attorneys searching for a plaintiff whose case would "facilitate" such a ruling.