by Scott Ott
(2003-09-24) -- French President Jacques Chirac ignited the crowd in the United Nations General Assembly yesterday with a moral vision which he called the "New Great Global Society Deal".
Mr. Chirac's vision calls for the U.N. to take a more active role in the affairs of nations. The New Great Global Society Deal includes the following elements:
-- International solidarity levies against companies which profit from globalization by investing in foreign countries. The tax dollars would go toward U.N. development programs that make microloans to women who weave cellular phone holsters out of flax.
-- A stronger U.N. Security Council which could set bounds to the use of force. Each member nation would be surrounded by a 1000-yard Gun Free Zone, with substantial fines for anyone found possessing a firearm within it. The Council would also triple the average length of the text of resolutions which almost threaten use of force.
-- Governments which violate humanitarian law will forfeit their sovereignty to the Secretary General. The Security Council will determine, by simple majority vote, what constitutes a human rights violation.
-- A reversal of the trend toward the increase in voluntary contributions at the expense of mandatory contributions to the U.N. The box with the mandatory contribution money in it will be guarded by blue-helmet U.N. troops and will be used for “super important multilateral things.”
-- Strengthening of the office of the high commissioner for human rights under the able leadership of Libya, North Korea, China, Iran, Saudi Arabia and other morally-equivalent nations.
-- The Secretary General will appoint a committee of independent wise men and women responsible for submitting proposals. They shall be called "wise proposal proposers and shall do nothing but think great thoughts and make wise proposals to the Council."
Mr. Chirac said his New Great Global Society Deal lacks only a United Nations resolution to establish its legitimacy.
At the end of his visionary speech, the General Assembly rose in unison and delivered a 13-minute standing ovation. Mr. Chirac showed his appreciation for their support by leaping into the "global mosh pit" where he was borne aloft by the eager hands of cheering U.N. delegates.
U.S. President George Bush also spoke at yesterday's session.
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