(2008-07-30) — Presumptive U.S. President Barack Obama today announced his plan to “end America’s dependence on foreign oil, dirty coal and dangerous nuclear power by unleashing new technology that will tap a recently-discovered source of renewable energy.”
According to an outline of the plan, Sen. Obama’s own “personal power and magnetic energy” will form the core of an entirely new system for keeping the lights on and the wheels rolling across the nation.
“The energy that we have generated among Democrats, journalists and Germans can, and should, be tapped,” he said. “When I’m sitting in the Oval Office I’ll issue an executive order to the Department of Energy mandating that it find a way to capture and deliver my personal power and magnetism to the energy-starved masses across this great, but tragically-flawed land.”
“People of world, it’s time to stop drilling the earth,” said Sen. Obama. “It’s time to start drawing warmth and light from an inexhaustible source. When we put our minds to it, there’s nothing I can’t do.”
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16 responses so far ↓
1 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 30, 2008 at 7:20 am
God Bless America
2 Ms RightWing, Ink // Jul 30, 2008 at 7:44 am
I OB1 Barrack is not a renewable resource
3 Ms RightWing, Ink // Jul 30, 2008 at 7:45 am
Ooops I mean I “hope” OB1 Barrack is not a renewable resource
4 Shelly // Jul 30, 2008 at 8:39 am
Scott, you took the self-worship right out of his mouth! I have no doubt Uuhhbama believes this completely.
5 Shelly // Jul 30, 2008 at 8:45 am
[If this shows up twice I apoligize.]
Scott, you took the self-worship right out of his mouth! I have no doubt Obama believes this.
And let’s not forget, the day he received the nomination is the day our children will remember as the day the oceans stopped rising.
6 conserve-a-tip // Jul 30, 2008 at 8:53 am
MsRightwing, Ink: I love it. OB1. That is what I am calling him from now on.
OB1’s new bumper sticker:
Let the Force Be With You!!
7 Shelly // Jul 30, 2008 at 9:14 am
Speaking of children, the Obamas never give their children presents for Christmas or their birthdays?
8 beekabok2 // Jul 30, 2008 at 9:37 am
“But the only power source capable of generating 1.21 gigawatts of electricity is a bolt of lightning.” Correction: perhaps a bolt of BO might do it
“Great Scott!” (pun intended)
9 da Bunny // Jul 30, 2008 at 10:21 am
Obama is certainly full of himself, but there’s no “power” or “magnetism” to tap into. Just a bunch of Marxist lies combined with elitist arrogance.
10 upnorthlurkin // Jul 30, 2008 at 11:32 am
CAT - more like “Let the Farce Be With You”
11 Beerme // Jul 30, 2008 at 12:51 pm
CAT and upnorthlurkin,
How about May the Schwartz be with you?
12 MajorDomo // Jul 30, 2008 at 2:59 pm
That secret source: Hot Air. Hey, it worked for The Sleazebag.
13 camojack // Jul 30, 2008 at 9:33 pm
I don’t think we’d get too far with that power source.
14 PanamaRed // Jul 30, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Camojack: It will if you concentrate the left-wingnuts in a confined space like Cape Cod and move all the windmills to the Kennedy Compound with a fan line branching over to John Kerry’s for reheating and recirculation.
Remember, hot air will power at least three Mercury Vapor lights for over thirteen minutes if the proper sized and pitch of the blades are optimized. Increased output of power can be had by just having loudspeakers saying “Bush is Great” or Bush won in 2000. Exponential output of air is guaranteed to increase by a factor of 454 over normal output. ET alone could power Crawford, Texas by himself.
Never under estimate new technology…throw in a few barrels of ethanol and we could face an overload on the power grid!
15 camojack // Jul 31, 2008 at 3:46 am
Thatscheme might not generate a whole of power…but it might be fun to watch, if nothing else.
16 Thursday Links : Stop The ACLU // Jul 31, 2008 at 5:37 pm
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