(2006-12-19) — First Lady Laura Bush, implicated in a scheme to cover-up news about surgery to remove a cancerous lesion from her shin, today cited the Supreme Court’s Roe v. Wade ruling as legal precedent for her covert activities.
Mrs. Bush, under increasing pressure from reporters to explain why she didn’t hold a news conference to announce her impending medical procedure, said, “The Constitution, as interpreted in Roe v. Wade, guarantees a woman’s right to privacy regarding her own health.”
“It’s my body,” she added, “and I have the legal right to do with it as I please without notifying any authority.”
On a personal level, the First Lady said she had no regrets about removing and disposing of the squamous cell carcinoma.
“It was a parasitic bundle of cells,” said Mrs. Bush, “and allowing it to continue to grow would have interfered with my lifestyle.”
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47 responses so far ↓
1 Scott Ott // Dec 19, 2006 at 6:43 am
Laura Bush Cites Roe v. Wade in Cancer Cover-Up…
by Scott Ott(2006-12-19) — First Lady Laura Bush, implicated in a scheme to cover-up news about surgery to remove a cancerous lesion from her shin, today cited the Supreme Court’s Roe v. Wade ruling as legal precedent for her covert activities.Mrs….
2 MargeinMI // Dec 19, 2006 at 7:07 am
God Bless America and Laura Bush!
3 Fred Sinclair // Dec 19, 2006 at 7:15 am
“God Bless America and Laura Bush!
Comment by MargeinMI — December 19, 2006 @ 7:07 am”
Double dittos and a great big AMEN!!!
Heirborn Ranger
4 gafisher // Dec 19, 2006 at 7:41 am
A larger issue looms unmentioned — if Laura Bush is incapacitated, should the Governor of Texas appoint a Republican to replace her, or does the last election constitute a mandate for Laura to be replaced by a Democrat? Given the importance of the office of First Lady (A.K.A. “Co-President”) should someone with recent experience be appointed to the post? Do the American People demand the return of their beloved Hillary to the Lincoln Bedroom?
5 Anonymous // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:28 am
Funny Scott,sir!
Were stem cells recovered? Could this have saved Christopher Reeve?
-Libby
6 mig // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:45 am
Well Get Well Wishes to Mrs. Bush.
7 mig // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:51 am
An interview topic for NP Air: How Laura Bushs’ life was saved by the right to chose. And the quandary of Lauras’ right to know of the planned invasion of her shin and the Cancers right to Constitutional freedoms and the privacy that protects against being recorded.
8 mig // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:54 am
If Laura had just been nice to the cancer and tried to find out why it wanted to invade her shin, they could have co-existed in harmony.
9 Hawkeye // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:58 am
TouchĂ© Scott… stick it to ‘em!
10 Maggie // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:59 am
Good Morning everybody.
In this case, I am pro-choice.
Best wishes for a speedy recovery to our most gracious First Lady,Laura Bush.
11 Hawkeye // Dec 19, 2006 at 9:00 am
Mig #8… BWAHAHAHA!
12 Analchord // Dec 19, 2006 at 9:21 am
Hildabeast cites Douche V Bidet in Yeast Infection coverup.
Diluting her reservoir of political capital, a flush Hillary Clinton refused to brook questions about a leaked report inundating the beltway concerning……..
13 Analchord // Dec 19, 2006 at 9:59 am
Reports that the wound on Laura Bush’s leg was caused by a knife fight with her husband George over why he let OBL slink away at Tora Bora were denied emphatically and the reporter who asked the question was detained at Gitmo for being a gimp-schmoe. (and he was knifed).
14 conserve-a-tips // Dec 19, 2006 at 10:06 am
Good morning. I don’t know about the prolife/prochoice argument in this case, but my immediate reaction would be to quote Shakespeare, “Out, out “darned” spot.” And I don’t mean the dog.
I never realized that when Hamlet quoth, “To be, or NOT to be. That is the question,” he was actually trying to decide whether to encourage abortion or not.
“Nothing is new under the sun.” Ecclesiastes
15 antodav // Dec 19, 2006 at 10:12 am
I don’t know what’s more shocking: that the First Lady of the United States, one of the finest we’ve ever had, was diagnosed with and operated on for cancer, or that she actually managed to keep it all a secret for so long. Is the media starting to slack off on their muckraking of the Bush Administration? Oh no! Whatever shall we do?!
Making jokes about abortion though, Scott, is never really funny. Although, it was clever, I’ll give you that much.
16 Just Ranting // Dec 19, 2006 at 10:18 am
Same old story…cut and run…cut and run.
17 Analchord // Dec 19, 2006 at 10:57 am
cut and run! great ref.
I love the way Scott goes way out there, in spite of the risks.
I agree that Laura Bush is irresistable. George W Bush is the luckiest man on the face of the earth. That’s for sure, that’s for dang sure.
18 mig // Dec 19, 2006 at 11:09 am
Oh no Analchord, my husband is. George is second luckiest.
19 conserve-a-tips // Dec 19, 2006 at 11:23 am
Well, guys, Mr. Enabler Himself, Donald-the-Trump, has announced that he is giving Miss USA a second chance. He isn’t helping this girl at all. She is already out there saying that she has to watch what she does, not because it is the right thing to do, but because she is “watched like a hawk”. Sheesh.
20 Fred Sinclair // Dec 19, 2006 at 11:44 am
Anyone know what’s up with Lady Right Wing, Inc? All e-mails to her are being bounced back as undeliverable. Changed provider or moved perhaps? Computer crashed? Nothing serious I pray.
Heirborn Ranger
21 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 19, 2006 at 12:18 pm
I, for one, will be praying for the young woman.
“Enabling” someone into rehab is not a bad thing.
If I hadn’t been blessed with numerous “second chances” over a nearly 40-year period (drunk from the age of 12), I wouldn’t be sitting here typing this right now-pushing 57 and sober nearly 8 years.
I hope and pray, however, that she will realize she’s not getting a “second chance” to do the same things, expecting different results but, rather, a “new chance” to live responsibly-and such “chances” do not grow on trees.
22 Mustard Seed // Dec 19, 2006 at 12:26 pm
Scott, there is something sick about the way your mind works. But we love it. Another good one.
23 seneuba // Dec 19, 2006 at 12:32 pm
Correction to #16:
Cut and limp, cut and limp.
Not sure she’d be up for running today.
24 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 19, 2006 at 12:49 pm
I guess it’s a good thing I’m not running the show because John F. Kerry and his ilk would not get back into my country.
25 Hawkeye // Dec 19, 2006 at 12:55 pm
Heirborn Ranger #20,
Ms RW was last heard from here at ScrappleFace back in the thread titled…
Conference to Explore Whether Ahmadinejad Happened
__________________________
P.S. It is a balmy 52 degrees here in the once dirty old factory town. And why could I not get on Scrapple this morning. I demand an accounting of what goes on, on the other side of my computer screen
Comment by Ms RightWing, Ink — December 13, 2006 @ 11:22 am
__________________________
Sounds like maybe she’s having computer problems. Hopefully all is well. Prayers goin’ up just to be safe.
26 Godfrey // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:03 pm
CAT: given the fact that she was plopped onto the pageant circuit at the age of four it was probably only a matter of time before she started drinking and snorting coke.
The beauty-queen mindset is a terrible thing to inflict on a child.
27 Shelly // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:07 pm
Hawkeye, thanks for the heads up.
I wonder if Kofi will also try to claim his privacy needs to be protected?
http://www.nysun.com/article/45403
I love how liberals “help” the less fortunate, while lecturing the rest of us.
28 da Bunny // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:23 pm
Global warming probably caused Laura Bush’s skin cancer. If only “W” had signed the Kyoto treaty. algore, please rescue us all from the evils of CO2…quit talking!!!
29 Maggie // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:26 pm
Hawkeye,
How were you able to determine Ms Right Wing’s last comment? Scott used to have an archive’s link.
30 everthink // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:26 pm
“given the fact that she was plopped onto the pageant circuit at the age of four it was probably only a matter of time before she started drinking and snorting coke. Comment by Godfrey — December 19, 2006 @ 1:03 pm
Was the “First Lady” really in “the pageant circuit at the age of four”?
It’s true, after taking up with Dumbyah, it was “only a matter of time before she started drinking and snorting coke”!
Hillary Clinton, on the other hand, was a “Goldwater Girl”.
31 Maggie // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:29 pm
Hello ‘da Bunny. Hoppy Holidays.
32 Analchord // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:30 pm
JamesonLewis3rd: I’m sober 18 years now, but only because my wife wont let me have any beer (or pot) in the house and I cant stand bars, (or raves). So I go without. Being straight all the time is a groove. I can get happy from accomplishments and great weather, rather than from the bottom of a bottle or bong. I’m going on 56 now, so we are in the same boat, except that my wife looks like Aunt Bea. (on steroids). So you win. How about those Iranian election results? Who would have thunk the Persians would be the “cooler heads” here?
33 Ghoti // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:31 pm
The Donald should have sent her back to her (and my) Old Kentucky Home, the land of beautiful horses and fast women.
34 RedPepper // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:32 pm
Surgery is so … violent !
I’m sure, if Laura’s cells could talk, they’d be saying,
“Can’t we all … just get along ?”
/moonbat
35 Analchord // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:38 pm
Hey mig, if you’re that hot, do you have any older sisters for me?
36 da Bunny // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:46 pm
Hi, Maggie!! Happy Holidays to you, too!!
#32…”except that my wife looks like Aunt Bea [on steroids].” Too funny!!
37 upnorthlurkin // Dec 19, 2006 at 1:51 pm
I found Ms. RW’s address and phone number and called. I’m praying it was her answering machine picking up because if it was her, she can’t talk…. Does anyone live near her?! I too am getting worried. Possum has been awfully quiet too!
38 nylecoj // Dec 19, 2006 at 2:24 pm
At least Possum just posted, but I think our prayers should go out to both of them.
Speaking of which, my prayers and well wishes for a blessed Christmas to you all.
39 JamesonLewis3rd // Dec 19, 2006 at 2:33 pm
Here’s another David Zucker video you might find comical-James Baker/Neville Chamberlain appeasing the madman in Iran/Germany.
40 mig // Dec 19, 2006 at 2:34 pm
No Analchord, I am one of a kind.
So we have an Amber Alert for Ms. RightWing… sigh… God Speed.
41 conserve-a-tips // Dec 19, 2006 at 2:45 pm
I will be praying for Ms Rightwing, Ink. I know that she was having difficulty with her vision just a month ago. She is such a neat person.
And I think that Possum has been posting some.
James, I am all for giving second chances, but this is actually many chances for her. There have been problems for quite some time. What we are ignoring here is that she has broken the law. If she were a “regular” kid, she would have been fined and possibly stayed a couple of days in jail. The message here is that if you are “somebody” you can get away with breaking the law and with immoral behavior. Donald has just exhibited the “loving to death” mindset and has just prolonged the agony of letting her hit bottom. She has not accepted responsibility for her actions just in the fact that Trump is making the excuse that she is young, was thrown into NYCity where everyone gets corrupted and that she just got caught up in the fun life. Sorry, but recovery demands rigorous honesty and for her to blame this on “demons” (the devil made me do it) is not being honest. Her chances are slim if she does not face, head on, the fact that she has a problem that is progressive and insidious.
And Godfrey, on beauty pageants, I can speak because we have been involved in both systems. I agree that to start a child out in pageants is sick and cruel. But that does not make the system such. The oldest daughter started pageants, both Miss America org. and Miss USA org., at 18 and did quite well in the Miss America system. It fries me that our present Miss America, who is the epitome of the young woman who is a roll model and an example of excellence, never gets covered, while the slutty antics of the Miss USA girls makes the news.
The Miss USA pageant is all about looks, no brains and sex. In the Miss America system, 70% of the score encompasses talent and interview. Only 10% is based on swimsuit. The interview in the Miss America system is 12 minutes long, involves an opening statement by the contestant in front of an entire panel of judges and then a myriad of questions from the judges regarding the contestant’s chosen platform (which she is to have been promoting on her own for the year prior) and her views on everything from politics to education to moral issues. The contestants are expected to be poised, well-spoken and well-informed. There is no room for a “bimbo”. The Miss USA system interview, however, is a whopping 4 minutes total, in front of one judge at a time and consists of questions like, “What do you think of the color choices for Fall this year?” or “What is your favorite movie?” In other words, there are expectations in the Miss America system and none in the Miss USA system…well, except for being well endowed up top! We were horrified at the daughter’s experience with the USA system and can’t say enough kudos to the Miss America system. Miss USA offers no scholarships except to a few podunk private schools of which nobody has ever heard. The Miss America organization, even at the local level, offers cash scholarships and education scholarships to a myriad of public and private universities and our daughter won a number of them, including a full one for her masters. Because of Miss America preliminary pageants, she was able to pay for her undergraduate and graduate degrees and did not have to go into debt. Just thought that you would like to know the bright side of it.
42 R.A.M. // Dec 19, 2006 at 3:11 pm
I think Laura should have the right to either talk about her surgery, or to keep it quiet if she wishes.
Remember, the previous first lady spoke this quote about her privacy:
“I am not going to have the press pawing through our papers,—-WE, are the President!”
43 camojack // Dec 19, 2006 at 3:25 pm
Oh, cut it out!
44 Hawkeye // Dec 19, 2006 at 3:50 pm
Maggie #29,
I just searched backwards through the last few threads. You can click on “Edit” in the main menu of your browser and use “Find in this page” (with Firefox) or “Find (on This Page)” (with Internet Explorer) [or just click Ctrl+F]. I used “rightwing” as the phrase I was searching for, and eventually found her last comment.
(:D) Regards…
45 Rock Slatestone // Dec 19, 2006 at 8:46 pm
Can’t Mrs Bush and the press just talk it through and work it out? Why must they fight about it?
Can’t we all just get along?
War is not the answer.
46 “Laura Bush cites Roe v. Wade in cancer cover up” « The Red Lion // Dec 20, 2006 at 3:46 am
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