(2008-08-15) — Authorities in Beijing today put to rest U.S. claims that girls on the Chinese gymnastics squad were not yet 16 years-old, the minimum age for Olympic competition, by noting that this is the year 4705 in China, not 2008.
“Our girls are actually older than their U.S. opponents based on our government’s more accurate [...]

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(2008-08-12) — Just days after China revealed that a cute little girl pretended to sing a patriotic song at the opening ceremonies of the Beijing Olympics because the real singer is buck-toothed and chubby, authorities in the People’s Republic today admitted that the man the world knows as President Hu Jintao, is also a lip-syncing [...]

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(2008-08-07) — In a double-trade designed to end bitter recriminations, and “to let bygones be bygones”, retired Green Bay Packers quarterback Brett Favre has been traded to the New York Jets, and in return, New York will send defeated presidential candidate Hillary Clinton to the Republican Party.
Neither superstar has dealt well with being “out of [...]

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(2008-01-26) — Just eight days before the Super Bowl, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady has reportedly been seen “hobbling along” in a full-body cast.
Previous speculation that Mr. Brady had a sprained ankle may have been “understated”, according to unnamed sports reporters who spoke to other sports reporters on the condition of anonymity.
Cynics in [...]

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(2007-12-14) — Now that former Sen. George Mitchell’s $20 million probe of steroid use in Major League Baseball has tarnished the names of top players like Roger Clemens and Andy Pettitte, President George Bush announced today he would appoint Mr. Mitchell to investigate Congress over allegations that many members use QPQ (quid pro quo) and [...]

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(2007-10-16) — As the Colorado Rockies swept Arizona in the National League Championship Series, boosting their recent record to 21-1, Democrats in the Senate called for public hearings into “potential issues of injustice.”
“When one business dominates others the way the Rockies have, it’s clearly not fair,” said Sen. Ted Kennedy, D-MA, whose home state [...]

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(2007-09-14) — The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) today filed suit against the NFL New England Patriots franchise claiming that video spying operations, purportedly aimed at their on-field opponents, actually cast a wider net than the team has thus far acknowledged.
“We plan to prove that Coach Bill Belichick also spied on fans in the stands,” [...]

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(2005-08-06) — The National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) today said it would consider a proposal by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) to ban teams from using “hostile” animal mascots during its sports tournaments. The NCAA imposed a similar ban on teams with American Indian names this week.
“Hostile animal mascots reinforce species stereotypes,” [...]

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(2005-02-15) — The National Hockey League, on the verge of canceling the season over a salary dispute with the player’s union, announced that negotiations would end today with a “bare-knuckle fistfight between the lawyers.”
Gary Bettman, the attorney who serves as NHL commissioner and Bob Goodenow, a lawyer and executive director of the player’s union, will [...]

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(2005-01-23) — As the clock wound down to the Eagles first NFC championship in four consecutive attempts, confused Philadelphia fans began booing an incompetent food vendor who dropped a hotdog.
“I felt sorry for the poor guy,” said one Conshohocken resident who witnessed the verbal assault. “Philadelphia fans are just so accustomed to booing at the [...]

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