First psycho, max you next.

Second in the name of the Pope!

As with all good satire, an element of truth exists. If he can wire-land on a carrier, he could go under cover with ease.

This CIC has the right stuff.

Ok, with the CBS headline of Bush knew calims were dubious, how long until the Dems start calling him George Dubious Bush instead of Dubaya?

Too bad Elvis is dead, they could be side kicks!

Bring em on.

Joe "droopy dog" Lieberman: If elected, I will personally make sure all intelligence is verified by at least four sources, which I will personally store in my jowls.

John Fitzgerald Vietnam Veteran Kerry: Iíve seen combat you know, Iíve got the metals to prove it. I will personally verify any intelligence given to my administration. Rest assured I will then denounce my role in intelligence gathering.

Howard ìThe ticking-time bombî Dean: What do you mean question my intelligence?.. What do I know about intelligence? If I need intelligence, Iíll have a gazillion, or maybe a quadrillion agents get it for me.

Al ìGet your groove onî Sharpton: ìIntelligence? I AM intelligent. Were it not to for, the establishments of proper informationism, provided to the peoples with transparinism, there would be no need for the CIA or the FBI, as they are merely tools of this administrasionism.

Terry LMBOffism!!

I have it on good information from British agents, who heard it from Chirac's prostitute mistress, that Elvis is not dead, and in fact has started working with Bush on undercover operations and on his dance moves for the Republican convention. I call on Lieberman to find four sources before I go public with this though.

I ALMOST thought this story true, except for the obvious falsehood, and that being:

An unnamed Democrat Congressman praised the President for his decision.

There is no way, ANY Democrat would praise President Bush, for ANYTHING!

Well, a lot of people are new and I've been away for a little while so I guess I should reintroduce my self to some of you. My Mother was a Stokes and Daddy was a Hymington So there's two of teh finest families of Baltimore, Hartford, and Boston represented in my bloodlines. I'm a thoroughbread, true, but I identify strongly with you poor people out there. I can only imagine how it feels to be crushed under the boot heel of the bigotted right.

I am a firm believer in a level playing field, for generations now my family has worked to lessen the burden of the African American, starting fron the days when abolitionist Great-Great-Great Grandparents on both sides of my family served on the Union Army draft boards in their cities.

I am the beneficiary of a very tidy trust fund. Through inspired charitably contributions I pay very little in taxes. Thus I ensure my money goes to worthy causes like supporting the Arts. I frown upon those who are opposed to paying taxes, as I know full well their accountants could structure similar solutions.

Also I support the Bill Terwilliger '04 Campaign. Bill, like so many who are forced now to labor under the "Democrat" banner, is a true and passionate socialist, dedicated to ensuring equal opportunity for all who strive, and minimal consequences fo those who do not.

Well, that's me in a nut shell. As I said, I've been away, but I'm sure my fellow ScrappleFace will join me in welcoming me back to these pages.

Is 'pages' the right word for an internet site? I'm not sure because there's no paper, is there? But people still say "web pages." That's funny! I have sent an e-mail to Al Gore on this and will let you know.

Al Gore invented the internet. A lot of people have forgotten that about him. He called it the "Information Supper Highway" though.

Also, I am a man. I don't know why people assume otherwise but they do. I share a name with a well known male cartoon character but people assume I am female. This perplexes both me and my life partner. She is a female, although she is... well it's none of your business so never mind. I am a red-blooded true-blue American man.

Oh, I'm such a scatterbrain sometimes. Honestly, my daddy used to say "Bambi, you'd forget your head if it wasn't jammed so hard up on your shoulders!" And maybe he was right. Anyhoo, the reason I was writing on here at all is because of that George Bush. Ohh he makes me so mad. I hope he just stays in Africa, well no I hope he just stays away from America. He's just copying Bill Clinton and trying to go one up on a real President who now lives in Harlem. Presidents should live in the country they are President of. This business of Bush living in Africa and that African president having to move to Nigeria is just silly.

Oh fiddlesticks! Wrong thread! My bad. This one was supposed to be about the CIA. Well, I for one hope we never see the day when the CIA is run by a Bush. I can only imagine how bad that wood be. The current CIA is still the one shaped by Mr Clinton, and that's all we need is for King George to run that into the ground too.

http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2003/iraq/forces/weapons/index.html

WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION

COALITION
• Chemical and biological defense
• Nuclear, biological, chemical detection
• Tactical nuclear warheads

IRAQ
• Anthrax
• Botulinum
• CS
• Cyclosarin
• Gangrene
• Ricin
• Rotavirus
• Sarin
• Sulfur Mustards
• Tabun
• Trichothecenes
• Vx
• Wheat smut

SOURCES

U.S. & Coaliton: U.S. Defense Dept., British Ministry of Defense, Periscope, Jane's Information Group, Australian Defense Ministry

Comical Ali has competition.

Bambi (who claims to be a man, but reality can only go so far),

Thanks for your "alternative" viewpoint. Now, according to Fairness & Accuracy In Reporting and the "equality" it stands for (again, reality can only be stretched so far), you must now go away for approximately 23 months.

Bush needs to be more of an 'undercover man' like Clinton was. Why, I remember fondly how he went to Africa to assure the people that he was, indeed, striking at an illegal chemical manufacturing facility rather than a simple aspirin plant.......... Oooops! well, maybe he didn't but I'm sure he considered it. I wonder if anyone got fired for THAT one or if the Democrats were demanding an investigation about it! OH, that's right, Monica was too much on their minds for such triviality.
Anyway, George needs to work on his stories. He ought to have a long talk with Bill.

KJ!

I just heard Elvis sing on the radio! How can he be dead?

I'm sure Max, beliver of Rense and alien abductions believes Elvis is alive. He will cite Mikey's post as proof.

Elvis is dead?

Max: It seems you have learned how to cut and paste.

are you jealous?

Max,
.

There you are...
Your Momma is looking for you...

Please click into my name to find her.

Be a good boy to her.
She loves you soooo much.
.

Bambi,
Al has been misunderstood for so long.
He never claimed to have invented the Internet!
He claimed to have invented the interNnet!

If GWB told you Elvis is still alive you would still believe him.

Elvis IS alive.

He is alive and well -- living in Niger.
That is the reason for Saddam having contacts with Niger.
Hussein want The Big E to be the opening act
for the two-week-long ceremony (commemorating Saddams great victory over the West. '1968')
The festivities are scheduled to begin July 17!

You remember George Bush Sr., don't you? Sure you do, he's the only American president to ever puke on another world leader. Of course, Bush was a Halcion-head at the time. In case you don't know, Halcion is a sleep medication that is banned in Great Britain but was popular in America at the time.

When asked if there might have been a conspiracy in the John F. Kennedy assassination, Bush says smugly: "Hey--there are some people who think Elvis is still alive." In other words, he--a former president and head of the CIA--equates any serious questioning of a proven fiction, the Warren Commission Report on the JFK assassination, with Elvis worship. Not that there is anything wrong with Elvis worship. When Satan is busy, Elvis will do in a pinch.

Just a reminder folks, we have had a Bush as head of the CIA .

I wrote this to inspire you to do what the powers that be wish you wouldn't: seek out suppressed evidence . . . interpret independently everything you hear, read, and even what you see . . . question authority . . . and keep an eye out for Elvis. Because if President Kennedy can die of a frontal wound inflicted by a sniper shooting from behind, if UFOs can exist in the opinion of American astronauts, the testimony of the world's pilots, and the writings of virtually every culture since the beginning of time, but not in any official capacity, Elvis just might be showing up soon at a location near you.

oh and P.S.
Keep the faith-- not only could Elvis show up, but Dubya may find all those nasty missing WMD's, along with Saddam Hussein, and Osama bin Laden too. Hey, it'd be another trifecta for him.

El Vez, a.k.a Janwoods78@hotmail.com, a.k.a ColoDem, RePUKEalator, seething Bush hater, angry woman....

why do you bother?

Have you considered anger management therapy?

El Vez
I'm glad to see I'm not the only person here who has his head screwed on straight! You are just the sort of person that we need some more on here!

Secret...Agent Man!

Bambi, I think your daddy said that you would forget your head if it wasn't jammed so far up your (deleted).

El Vez, every culture of the planet also has some version of elves and fairies as well. Seen any?

I was afraid that we as a group were spinning down the right wing conspiracy drain, but then the epiphany of reason shined down. Sometimes I am uncertain whether to take someone on here seriously, so I look to certain indicaters of credibility. And when shown the reason, the light, the way, all open minds must be converted. I found it. I am a believer. UFO's. The Rosetta Stone of US political thought. They are the answer. El Vez is the voice of reason, the prophet, the way. Of course, the US Government (and no others?) are hiding the truth. If it weren't so, then it would have told us about the UFO's. The anal probe cover up conspiracy? How deep does it go?

El Vez, please tell us.

UFOs are make believe, like fairies, elves and eskimos.

for Cassandra :

"Il faut dÈtruire Alpha 60 et sauver ceux qui pleurent"...

If the government is hiding the truth, and El Vez claims to know the truth, then he must be working for the government so don't believe anything he/she says.

I, on the other hand, have no clue what the truth is, so listen to me and do exactly what I say.

Unlike gener confusion caused by the name Bambi (a male deer in a movie (and apparently here at Scrappleface), but a female stripper in every club across America), El Vez is definitely a man. Otherwise, it would be La Vez, no?

twalsh: you are a genius (applause).

"Gener" confusion? Gender. Sorry.

Very amusing. The point here is that Bush included in his State of the Union Address a story which the CIA and State were telling him was at best dubious and at worse false and even nonsensical, all to stampede the American people into his crusade against Saddam.

Did Saddam pose an imminent threat? I think we'll see Elvis riding a UFO before we see evidence of that.

Just heard "villigent" Bush's latest press conference. He told the assembled how the evidence that Saddam had weapons of mass destruction was that he used them on his own people. Good one, George II! AND THE US GOVERNMENT PROVIDED INTELLIGENCE SUPPORT TO SADDAM WHILE HE WAS USING THEM because he was then fighting the mad mullahs of Iran for us.

Susan Serin-Done complains that Democrats don't praise Bush for anything. Heck, Democrats keep voting for his stupid policies. The real question is, when are you Republicans gonna wake up to the fact that we have a guy in the White House who's spent the Vietnam War AWOL and most of his young adulthood [profanity deleted] up on booze, pills, and white powder?

The Terminator: No, Saddam used the WMDs on the Marsh Arabs when they revolted against him after the Gulf War, not back in the '80s. And we were certainly not giving intelligence to him by then.