(2003-01-19) -- The government of the Republic of Iraq has offered to sell the technology it used to destroy all traces of its weapons of mass destruction.

In a goodwill gesture to the U.S. and the U.N., Saddam Hussein said he would sell the secret technology to any country that wanted to rid its land of chemical, biological and nuclear weapons.

"As you can see," said President Saddam Hussein, "Iraq is practically spotless. Though we had thousands of gallons of the nasty stuff just a few years ago, the weapons inspectors haven't found a trace. At Hans Blix's office, they call me 'Mr. Clean'."

Western governments have wrestled for years with how to safely dispose of chemical and biological agents and nuclear waste. However, Iraqi technological genius has solved the problem. Mr. Hussein said he is willing to sell the technology to other countries "at a fair price."