ScrappleFace: EU to be Rebranded as 'Europe Classic'

EU to be Rebranded as 'Europe Classic'

(2003-01-14) -- Valery Giscard d'Estaing, who heads a major convention examining all aspects of the European Union's future development, proposed today that the floundering conglomeration of nations rebrand itself as "Europe Classic."

Previously, in an interview with the UK's Financial Times newspaper, Mr. d'Estaing hinted that his preferred new name for the EU would be United Europe. However, he learned later that the domain name www.unitedeurope.com is already taken, as is www.unitedeurope.org.

The URL www.europeclassic.com is apparently still available, but the main reason for the new name is to comfort fearful Europeans.

"People are wary of new things," said Mr. d'Estaing. "Even though our long term plan is to strip these nations of their sovereignty and create one political monolith, we don't want to frighten the people. Europe Classic sounds sweet and old fashioned...like the good old days when each nation had its own monarchy."

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holyromanempire.com/gov/etc are taken but are for sale, as are vast numbers of variants kindly suggested by Register.com. unholyromanempire.*, however, is wide open.

Posted by: Jonathan Cohen at January 15, 2003 11:29 AM

What's wrong with "New Europe" or "Europe Blue" or "Diet Europe"? We could also have "Cherry Europe" and "Vanilla Europe".

Sounds like something one would want to wash down a McAfrika Burger with (yum).

Posted by: the talking dog at January 16, 2003 06:44 PM

U.S.A.: Can't Beat The Real Thing!

Posted by: Just John at January 20, 2003 05:59 PM

U guys are idiots. How are countries getting stripped of their sovereignity? And most countries still have their own monarchies, retards. By the way, the Europeans are richer than us, so I wouldn't say much.

Posted by: at January 22, 2003 11:08 AM

Oh my god. Richer than us? We can outproduce the pants off of ANY european nation. You nationalize industry, you produce crap. At a slow rate. The only real industrial power in europe is Germany, and even they cannot come close to our mass-producing might.

And their losing sovereignty by giving up economic rights first. The 'common market'. A standardized currency. The borders will begin to blur in the next 50-75 years.

Posted by: ahabdelta at January 25, 2003 03:13 AM

oops. that 'their' should be 'they're'. hehe doh

Posted by: ahabdelta at January 25, 2003 03:14 AM

Hey hold on, we europeans are richer. "'Just John' said so and I believe.

Europe vs. America has to be richer, we dont put any money into investing in natioanl security instead we let you yanks do it all for us, thanks for keeping the reds of our backs for 40 years guys, oh and keeping the oil cheap. And for keeping 000'000s of soldiers over here pumping money into our economies.

Hope you don't mind if we cut you loose to fight the middle east on your own do you? Good, cos we're democratic with short memories and so that's what we're doing.

Seriously though, your budget needs some reining in spending 3% more per year than you make.... will a poor man make.

Posted by: Mr Happy at January 28, 2003 03:23 PM

The Europeans must have more money than the Americans. They have Ferrari, Lamborghini, Mercedes, Rolls Royce, etc. See now! True dat! I won't say much...else.

Posted by: HoobadaGoobada at January 30, 2003 01:47 AM

unitedeurope is very good

Posted by: at February 3, 2003 07:28 AM