ScrappleFace: French Resolution Threatens 'Aggressive Indecision'

French Resolution Threatens 'Aggressive Indecision'

(2002-10-27) -- France this week will propose a new resolution to the U.N. Security Council for dealing with Iraq. The measure calls for "aggressive indecision" on the matter.

"We want Saddam to know that if he fails to comply with previous U.N. resolutions, he can expect endless debate in the U.N.," said French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin. "We will continually talk about Iraq, and get ever so close to passing resolutions, but then we'll block the vote. This strategy is aimed at driving Saddam insane."

France, the acknowledged world leader in diplomacy and military strategy, has once again taken the lead on this issue of historic significance. French diplomats are said to be preparing speeches that last for days and resolutions with circuitous language making them virtually impervious to an up-or-down vote.

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Germany protested the resolution, stating it was too "aggressive" and demanded the French tone down the resolution. The French immediately surrendered to the German's demand and called a commission to revise the wording. As a show of good faith, two synagogues were ordered burned.

Posted by: Darth Monkeybone at October 27, 2002 05:20 PM

Mais ouis! We French are just taking a page from zat great Americain statesan, Robert Byrd, who thought of many creative ways to block debate in your senate.

You know, Iraq used to be in OUR French sphere of influence! We still want it ourselves-- and Saddam (mais ouis) is a good customer! AS DeGualle said at an American military cemetary in Normandy-- why is it you AMericans INSIST on staying where you are not wanted?

Posted by: the talking dog at October 27, 2002 08:42 PM

The French have used "aggressive indecision" for many years, dating back to WWII, when they used it to successfully deter a Nazi invasion of France.

Posted by: rinardman at October 28, 2002 06:45 PM

And Russia, and China,and everyone else except Easten Europe. They all want to avoid war. They all probably just after Iraq oil, not like US, who wants to kill thousands of people to "liberate" them.

Posted by: john at February 24, 2003 01:08 PM

ëVe French have improved upon our deterrents for war. 'Ve have vastly improved on 'zi "Maginot Line".

As for dealing with our dear 'Mess-sewer Saddam we have devised the "Imaginary Line". ëVe must do 'zis because the only war ëzat 've have ever won was the French Revolution. And we had to debate 'zat one too.

Posted by: Ronnie Smith at February 25, 2003 09:32 AM

I want my father returne from France, he is burried in Lorraine American Cemetery St. Avold France plot A row 25 Grave 10. Does not deserve to be there the way The FRENCH are supporting the USA and kissing Saddams [backside].

Posted by: george kinley at March 5, 2003 08:36 PM

They say all families share similar traits.
I wonder if Jimmy Carter urinates on the tarmac like his brother Billy used to do.

Imagine....."Oh...Hullo Saddam your highness, just 'gimme a second to shake 'ma weasel. Huh? Oh no....my little weasel not the one in 'ma 'haid.

Next, we'll have Jimmy beer just like Billy beer and a non-alcoholic version for his "Mu-slime" buddies. He can call it "Le Barley-Hop Chirac"

Posted by: M. Ronald Smith at March 10, 2003 12:03 PM

Here's an idea for the french. Since you are so inclined to protect Saddam, then my suggestion is that you offer him, his sons, and all of his henchmen asylum in YOUR country.
Rest assured that I am following the boycott of ALL french products and will not knowingly spend one dime on any product with french involvement.
P.S. You can also have the dixie chicks.
Note that I have not capitalized french, or dixie chicks. This is direct disrespect.

Posted by: Frank at March 19, 2003 04:28 PM