(2002-08-22) -- The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) filed suit against itself in federal district court today alleging that the ACLU was not founded by Roger Baldwin, Crystal Eastman, Albert DeSilver and others in 1920, but rather evolved from a bacterium or perhaps the giant tube worms which dwell at the edge of undersea volcanic fissures.

The lawsuit further contends that ACLU employees do not have the right to openly discuss the various theories of its origin, including the so-called "intelligent design" theory.

"The idea that some wise being or beings conceived of the ACLU in their minds and brought it into existence in a relatively short period of time within the past century is patently absurd," according papers filed with the court on behalf of the plaintiff. "The theory that giant tube worms, whose structure and habitat resemble the modern ACLU, is much more plausible. In fact, it is so substantial one hesitates to call it a theory anymore."

The timing of the lawsuit could prove a distraction as ACLU lawyers have just engaged in another origins case in Cobb County, Georgia. That case involves the right of a local school board to place the following label on a science book:

"This textbook contains material on evolution. Evolution is a theory, not a fact, regarding the origin of living things. This material should be approached with an open mind, studied carefully, and critically considered."