by Scott Ott
(2005-07-15) -- President George Bush today fired longtime friend and political wizard Karl Rove, the embattled White House deputy chief of staff at the center of the most devastating scandal to engulf a presidency in the history of the republic.
In the same news conference, the president announced that he would replace Mr. Rove with columnist Robert Novak, who broke the story that Valerie Plame was a famous covert CIA 'operative'.
"Bob Novak knows what's going on in Washington better than his predecessor did," said Mr. Bush. "He's the one who told Karl that Ambassador Joe Wilson's wife was a spy. People talk to Novak. He's a regular Oprah Winfrey."
Mr. Bush also said he "admires the resilience of the scrappy columnist."
"This Plame thing has got one reporter in jail, another turning state's evidence and Karl Rove spilling his guts three times before the grand jury," said Mr. Bush, "but not Bob Novak. He's a Chevy truck -- like a rock. He's the one who lit the fire. He's not talking, but he's still walking. I'm going to have him spray some of that Teflon on the White House."
In related news, an unnamed source close to the prosecutor's office said the Bush administration coverup of the Rove scandal continues.
"The president's team is quite clever," said the anonymous source. "They're trying to bury us in information by giving us all that we've requested -- documents, testimony...everything. The fact that the White House is not being secretive with the grand jury or the prosecutor is the main evidence of criminal activity."
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