November 10, 2004
Arafat May Soon Sign Death Certificate by Scott Ott (2004-11-10) -- Palestinian officials said this morning that ailing leader Yassir Arafat, who is alive, may soon approve his own death certificate. "In the Palestinian Authority, all significant actions require the Chairman's consent," said an unnamed aide to Mr. Arafat, "No one but the Chairman can sign off on his death certificate, so that is why we are waiting patiently at his bedside." Witnesses, who have visited the Paris hospital room where Mr. Arafat is deliberating, said the death certificate and a pen rest on a tray table above the Chairman's bed. "We don't want to pressure him," said the source. "He's a very thoughtful man. And we would not presume to tell a Nobel Peace Prize winner when it's time to rest in peace." Donate | More Satire | Printer-Friendly | |
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