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February 28, 2004
Bush Delaying Bin Laden Capture News Until His Approval Ratings 'Really Tank' by Scott Ott (2004-02-28) -- An unnamed senior White House official today confirmed reports from an Iranian news agency that Usama bin Laden had been captured "long ago", but said the Bush administration was withholding the news "until the president's poll numbers really tank." Despite the fact that months of Democrat attacks on President George Bush have pushed his favorable ratings to an all-time low, the official said "the president has a standing order with his press secretary to release the news of bin Laden's capture when his approval rating slips below 40 percent." "The president doesn't want to peak too early in the campaign," said the source. "He's going to show Kerry what 'comeback kid' really means." Donate | More Satire | Printer-Friendly | |
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