They Haven't even found any of his doubles. I think we've been hoodwinked! Bamboozled! I'm coming to my senses right now, and I'm going to put a stop to this nonesense...

Heh. I was gonna say...

They were all body doubles! Every one! It was all a vast charade, a conspiracy.

But Greyhawk makes a good point. Then again, there's makeup, hair dye. Heck, emergency plastic surgery worked for Jack Napier. Changed his appearance completely, no joke.

So they were all doubles, and by removing or changing their makeup, shaving moustaches, cutting or coloring their hair, dressing differently, the doubles all faded into the proverbial woodwork. Now we can't even prove there was a conspiracy of rule by body double.

Since there was never a Saddam Hussein then there was never a Ooglay either, eeh?

So since we have never found the real killer of OJ's wife and Ron Goldman then we can assume he never existed and that proves that OJ is the real killer. Works for me!!!

I think that I saw him in San Diego on TV. Nope that was Scott Peterson with his hair dyed a growing a goatee so he would blend in better with the Mexican population I guess.

Saddam should try that.

Have Saddam and Scott Peterson ever been seen together? Think about it.

And what about Osama? Maybe they're all the same person. In fact, I've never seen Bush in person, either! Maybe it's a vast conspiracy by Hollywood! I've never seen Susan Sarandon with any of them! Maybe...

Actually, I haven't seen Elvis and Saddam at the same time. Elvis "died" about the time Saddam took over.. Not to impune Elvis.

This has been around a while so everyone may already have seen it, but it's so perfect for this story:

The real Saddam

I think Saddam evolved from Max Headroom!

Of course Saddam was never real. If you look closely at the video footage you can see that he was no more than an animatronics tailors dummy. He is probably back in the downtown Baghdad Department store where they got him from in the first place. We should be looking more closely at Hollywood, I suspect they were behind pulling Saddams strings.

After really thinking about this, maybe Saddam was the evil version of Jimmy Stewart in "It's a Wonderful Life", and the Angel didn't give him a chance to regain his life! THE HAPPY END!!!

Arrrrgh! Now once again I must submit myself to an orgy of self flagelation. It is Ooglay who has been trying to tell you infidel georgeboosh worshippers that my Glorious Father, for whom you will rebuild Iraq, is in ...
No! Ooglay won't fall for that trick Mr Jericho. You get up earlier to outsmart me okay pig?
Hey, Scrapple people can help Ooglay. Now in Hollywood reporting for Mudville Gazette, Ooglay has blind date with Jean Garflow. You know of her? Is she hot? Ooglay only has time for finest...

Ooglay -- Dad wants you to call him. Qusay

Months ago, though it seems like only yesterday, I wrote on this forum that I refused to give any legitimacy to any "peace activist", hollywood star or not, unless that individual could furnish evidence of his/her vocal opposition to the Clinton excursions in Bosnia, Haiti, Somalia, and Iraq (only bombings of aspirin factories, but warlike nonetheless). I'm still waiting!

Where is that Democratic Liberal compassion that we have heard so much about? It seems that the only people who care at all about the Iraqi people and the corpses they are digging up are those school children starving, senior citizen abusing Conservative Republicans. Go figure!

Joseph-- Exactly! I've been patiently waiting for a coherent answer or explanation for the anti-war lack of concern over clinton's military excurions---have yet to hear one. Not a single one. Completely amazing that they are so blind to such blatant, glaring hypocrisy!

This Saddam story sounds perfect for a Twilight Zone episode!

I believe Saddam had plastic surgery and is now....Greta Van Susteren. He figures noone would ever look for him at Fox News. I believe this is why he/she now talks exclusively about the Laci Peterson case and never mentions Iraq.

It wasn't hip to protest Clinton's wars

twalsh:

Does this mean we now have to refer to him/her as "Saddam (who was a man)"?

A truly brilliant, penetratingly perceptive article. It's about time the truth be told!

While we are at it, there is conclusive evidence that Osama Bin Laden never existed either. It's all just a conspiracy of the right-wing Jewish Anglo-American, capitalist, imperialist,pro-Bush Illuminatti, homophobic, speciests, who control the minds of people everywhere,and were the real purpetrators behind the 9/11 incident.

It is certainly gratifying to know that there are a few of us out here that really know the truth.

Heh. I love it.

(First out of the room in "Rat Race" too, I suppose)

My ex-wife hasn't found me yet. Maybe I don't exist.
Anybody know Latin? I'm trying to come up with the translation for: I don't think, therefore I am not.

Remember this one from Queen?
And another one falls, and another one falls, another one bites the dust, hey, Bashir we are gonna get you too, another one bites the dust.

Or how about this oldie from the Buggles?
Living in the PC age, goodbye sense without a trace.

Or this favorite from days Three Dog Night?
They got the whole UN cafeteria in their hands, they got the whole UN cafeteria in their hands, they got the whole UN cafeteria in their hands, the worlds diplomats got it in their hands.

And what recap would be complete without this fav from the fab four.
Here come ole Chi-rac. He is o-pressing the I-Coast, he is movin the cocoa, he is shipping the diamonds, he's got blood - up to - his very knees, Him and his pal Kofi you just would not believe....

No Saddam means no government which means anarchy. So the US simply went in to restore order and distribute food and other humanitarian functions. Just like when the US first went into Somalia.

It doesn't make any sense in Latin, but I think it would be Non cogito, ergo non sum.

Some random guy:

non cognito, ergo non sum?

That may be too easy. I know the non sum part is OK, not sure about the non cognito...

Maybe a better motto:

non cognito, ergo liberal sum.

ruprecht,
Good point, but Bush is in office not Clinton. CLinton ran with this tail between his legs at the first sign of trouble (anything to save his career and save face in front of the ignorant masses).

I'm not sure that the Baathist government was that far away from anarchy, myself.

Jon,
yeah, what is better: temporary anarchy or people being executed, tortured, dropped in shredders etc?

Apparently, Daschle is backpedaling now... expect all the other Dumb-o-crats to start falling into line.

I guess they figured out that there was NO way to continue pushing their "hate-Bush" agenda in the faces of the US citizenry.

Of course, THEY'RE still too stupid to know that WE'RE not so stupid that we'd actually believe the timing of their sudden support is just a silly coincidence and has nothing to do with them jumping out of the 2004 race's starting gates.

They ALL look more and more like Slick - that nasty, amoral, excuse for a human being. What a waste of skin he was.

In the words if that eminent philospher, Renee Descartes (who by the way is the last frenchman worth a damn) "I dictate...therefore I am!"

Saddam who? Shave off the 'stash, loose some weight, and voila! Jimmy Carter's evil twin (fraternal, of course)!

This causes problems ... big problems. If Saddam Hussein never existed, who do we give Iraq back to, if we don't find any WMDs?

Any X-Files fan already knew that Saddam Hussein never existed. The Men In Black, based at Area 51, created him. He was played by an actor who was discovered doing dinner theater in Omaha ("does good ethnics"). C'mon, guys, check the literature.

I'm a Latin teacher, and Mark is right: 'non cogito, ergo non sum'. Cassandra's version has an extra N in the second word: it sounds more like English 'cognitive' but is not good Latin.

Kyrie Elieson on E pluribus Unum!!!

( Lord have mercy on one out of many!)

( Mister Mister meets the mint (:~})

my humble contribution to our Latin Class.

Straight from the Persian Gulf, as MajGen Mattis gave a pep talk to departing Marines:

"When you guys get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a [wussy.]"

-Commanding General, 1st Marine Division

I thought "Kyrie Elieson" was Greek.

or an Australian pop-star.

I keep getting them confused.

SRG is correct - it is Greek - actually one of the few remaining greek phrases in the liturgy. I once heard someone sing "Carrying a Laser" at the top of their lungs to the tune of "kyrie elieson".

Dr. Weevil - thanks for the correction. I wondered about the "n". I know next to nothing about Latin, so that was a SWAG on my part. Do you know of a good site/book to look up Latin tags? I run into them in reading, but they are almost never explained, which is incredibly annoying.

Dr. Hook:

Glad to see he hasn't succumbed to the multi-star disease yet. I don't think I've seen a General who minces words less than Gen. Mattis - maybe Al Gray... What a guy!

Dr. Hook,

I'm slice-1, slice-1 even further, myself. If every hole was a radical dog-leg to the right, I'd kick Tiger's butt.
That is, if I had a short iron game around the green, and if I could putt.

;-)

We got him. Who's crying now? Bush-haters, jew-haters, Baathists, Islamic extremists, Jeaneane Garofalo,and possibly David Blaine (who now realizes he may not hold the record for consecutive days in an isolation chamber).