ScrappleFace: Raelians 'Download' Dolly's Brain Into New Clone

Raelians 'Download' Dolly's Brain Into New Clone

(2003-02-14) -- Taking another step toward human immortality, CLONAID claimed today that the company "downloaded" the contents of Dolly's brain before the famous cloned ewe passed away.

A spokesman for the Roslin Institute in Edinburgh, where the world's first cloned mammal lived her brief six years, challenged the CLONAID claim.

But Dr. Brigitte Boisselier, a Raelian Bishop, who is now Managing Director of CLONAID, said her staff sneaked into Dolly's pen several days ago, and used an Apple iPod to transfer Dolly's memories and personality onto a computer chip.

The sheep's "mind" was then downloaded into a recently-cloned sheep fetus.

"In a few months, we'll unveil her to world," said Dr. Boisselier. "She will have Dolly's mannerisms, attitude and intelligence. All Earthlings will see that she is Dolly reincarnated."

Meanwhile, the grieving continues at the Roslin Institute. The New York Times today quoted a scientist who helped synthesize Dolly.

"The fact the she isn't there any more will be brought home to us when we go near that barn and she's not there," said Dr. Ian Wilmut.

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Mmmmmmm...identical lamb chops.

Posted by: Homer Simpson at February 14, 2003 10:49 PM

"The world's press is scratching its collective head over Dr. Wilmut's cryptic remark. News media promised an interpretation by week's end."

Posted by: John J. Coupal at February 15, 2003 02:40 AM

(A week later) A nervious looking Public Relations rep. told a crowd later today that the "best and most gifted men" were not able to make anything out of the doctor's remarks.

Posted by: Paul C. Tindall at February 15, 2003 06:27 PM

Sometimes people say funny things all by themselves with no help from us!

Posted by: Loretta at February 16, 2003 02:57 PM

Well goodbye, Dolly
This is Louis, Dolly
It's so sad that you're not here
Where you belong!

Posted by: Louis Strongarm at February 17, 2003 12:14 PM

The sheep's "mind" could be downloaded into GWB's head. He could only improve. ;)

Posted by: A Frenchman at February 18, 2003 10:34 AM

Hey, A Frenchman, I thought making fun of W's intelligence and/or looks was too easy. How about practicing what you preach?

Ken Stein

Posted by: Ken Stein at February 18, 2003 04:52 PM

Hoops Sorry, I cound not help myself ! ;)

Posted by: A Frenchman at February 19, 2003 07:45 AM

That's alright Frenchie, we all realize lying is a French weakness! A Nation has to have integrety to keep their word!

Posted by: Pepe LeP.U. at February 22, 2003 04:48 AM

"How Bush and his junta succeeded in deflecting America's anger from bin Laden to Saddam Hussein is one of the great public relations conjuring
tricks of history." Said John Le Carre.

GWB is quite a good liar too ! ;)

Posted by: Frenchman at February 25, 2003 08:18 AM

How Bush and his junta succeeded in deflecting America's anger from bin Laden to Saddam Hussein is one of the great public relations conjuring tricks of history." Said John Le Carre.

GWB is quite a good liar too ! ;)

Posted by: Frenchman at February 25, 2003 08:20 AM

This is insane, what exactly does reincarnating a sheep have to do with president bush?! you people are making your idiocy blatantly known do you even care that the sheeps mind was "Saved" on a computer chip and is being recreated this is affront to God. and regardless of your religious stand point shouldnt this rouse a deeper thought then "How can I make a joke about it?"

Posted by: Scott at February 20, 2004 04:50 PM