ScrappleFace: All Prisoners Released from Jails in U.S.

All Prisoners Released from Jails in U.S.

(2003-01-03) -- Inspired by Illinois Governor George Ryan, who commuted the death sentences of 167 death row inmates this week, governors across the nation have decided to release all prisoners from all jails.

"Ryan said there are errors in the system. If we can't do criminal justice perfectly, we shouldn't do it at all," said an aide to one governor. "It's not enough just to commute death sentences to life in prison, we need to let them all out."

Studies have shown that state governors are significantly smarter than judges and juries. The average governor can decide a case in a few minutes without even attending the trial, although it takes a jury weeks of carefully listening to the evidence. Even then, the jury is almost always wrong.

State courts will shut down this week because, as one governor put it, "we can't take the chance that we might get another one wrong."

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Moral Void

Posted by: at January 12, 2003 06:45 PM

Digby,

Followed your link.

Talk about a moral void...

Posted by: Anon at January 13, 2003 12:22 AM

Except he didn't "release" prisoners he just changed their sentences from death to life in prison. A big difference...

I don't trust the "average American" or my goverment to decide who lives and who dies.

Do you?

Posted by: yoyo at January 13, 2003 02:59 AM

I don't trust the "average American" or my goverment to decide who lives and who dies

Better not support any war at all then, not even ones of defense. Better not support armed police, or SWAT teams. Better not let the government make any health care descisions.

Your statement is ridiculous on the face of it.

And apparently you've forgotten that juries are involved... since when is a jury part of the government?

There are cognent arguments against the death penalty. Yours isn't one of them.

Posted by: Ryan Waxx at January 13, 2003 10:16 AM

hey yoyo -

scrappleface is a SATIRE site. Of course the Governor of Illinois in real life did not release all those murderers. The posting pokes fun at his actions by extrapolating his (irrational) logic to prove a point. "if you can't get a capital murder case right, then how good are we with the rest of the criminal justice system?"

imho i believe too many guilty walk the streets, but that's the price of not incarcerating the innocent. but lighten up on the critique of "facts" on a satire site, ok?

Posted by: tom at January 13, 2003 01:26 PM

the truth is that it is a LOT easier to get the rest of the criminal justice system right than it is to get capital punishment right. Capital cases are rife with emotion and horrific details that can cloud the judgment of prosecutors, judges and jurors moreso than a simple larceny case. That is the reason capital punishment cannot be meted out fairly and that is the reason that Ryan did what he did. (Also to receive some dispensation from the Lord for the corruption that riddled his administration and his sleazy past as Illinois Secretary of State. There's your religious angle, Scott.)

Posted by: Abiebabylincoln at January 14, 2003 05:41 PM

Your post has been linked to in all seriousness.. natch :-)

Posted by: Suman Palit at January 14, 2003 06:49 PM

Actually, it's extremely easy to get capital punishment right. You murder someone...you die. Period. Read this article: http://www.accessatlanta.com/ajc/opinion/0302/0314death.html.

Posted by: Robert Harper at January 20, 2003 03:23 PM

Yes...speaking of horrific details, one of Ryan's big lottery winners was that couple who, because they wanted a child, killed a pregnant acquaintance and slit her abdomen open and took her baby.

Posted by: robert at January 21, 2003 07:56 AM

Perhaps we SHOULD release all the most dangerous prisoners and transport them to Iraq in the same manner that England used with their convicts in the penal colony of what is now Australia!

Posted by: MELL at January 23, 2003 08:16 PM

Here's the solution. Not the death penalty, which I actually like. I'd be willing to give up the death penalty in exchange for tough prisons. Sure, state pen is hard, but when you can smuggle drugs in, thats just bad. What you need are gulag-like prisons. Solitary confinement. 10-14 hours of hard labor per day. Still provide meds, basic health needs etc. Just make it REALLY suck.

Posted by: Ahabdelta at January 25, 2003 03:06 AM

Ahabdelta is on the right track but everyone I know some people that have spent time in prison and they said it REALLY sucked. CP is the best deterrent around as I don't recall EVER seeing a CP recipient killing again unlike a parolee in our slap-on-the-wrist revolving door system. CP should be televised and the system needs to work faster. When people start seeing their buddies get executed one after the next on the death channel...maybe it'll sink in that there is something to fear after the crime and that the library and weight room in prison is NOT going to be a reality but rather death is.

Posted by: skater69 at January 27, 2003 05:47 PM