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January 09, 2003
Bin Laden Unveils Plans for Patty Murray Hospital

(2003-01-09) -- Usama Bin Laden announced plans today to build a new hospital in Seattle named after Sen. Patty Murray, D-WA.

The popular Islamic philanthropist said Patty Murray General Hospital would serve the poor and children for free.

Sen. Murray, in a speech to high school students recently, attributed Mr. Bin Laden's popularity to his humanitarian work in building hospitals, schools and roads in impoverished communities in Afghanistan and elsewhere.

"Of course the Senator is honored," said a spokesman. "She'll be at the ribbon cutting. She hopes to meet Mr. Bin Laden, who is the Mother Theresa of our generation."

A spokesman for Mr. Bin Laden said he wants no publicity.

"This is just who he is," said the spokesman. "Allah has blessed him, and he wishes to be a blessing to others. Sen. Murray impressed him with her vast knowledge, and sensitivity."

Mr. Bin Laden also plans to pay tribute to Sen. Murray by building a new airport in her honor in eastern Virginia.

by Scott Ott | Donate | | Comments (6) | More Satire | Printer-Friendly
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I almost sprayed a mouthful of coke all over my laptop screen... and that was after reading just the headline!

Doug Morris

(Still waiting for your TV show!)

Posted by: Doug Morris at January 9, 2003 10:39 PM

Would that be a "Memorial Hospital"?
Ouch! I know...stop throwing oranges.

Posted by: Steve at January 9, 2003 11:16 PM

Patty Murray General Hospital:
sounds like a bad soap opera set in Washington (DC).

Posted by: MarcV at January 10, 2003 12:17 PM

We in Washington State ask; SO STOP ALREADY...do not encourage her...good grief, she has now picked out a new outfit to wear to the hospital opening party.

Posted by: An Old Old Lady at January 10, 2003 11:35 PM

Send her to New Zealand. She'll be perfectly at home there, in a country run by female peaceniks.
(the country that gives instant citizenship to ship hijackers..the "Tampa" mob)

Posted by: at January 23, 2003 07:23 PM

HEY! There are already enough challenges in healthcare without adding any more from a hospital honoring an arrogant know-nothing like Ms. Pitty-Pat....

Posted by: Guy Gadoire at January 24, 2003 11:18 AM
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