(2002-09-12) -- The U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) launched a probe today to determine how many illegal aliens are actually entering the U.S. through gaping holes in the Microsoft Windows operating system.

"We know that thousands of Mexicans cross the U.S. borders in Texas and California each year, but that doesn't account for the huge number of resident illegal aliens," according to an INS spokesman. "Recently, we began to wonder how many of these folks are just hacking into the country, or attaching themselves to an email, or exploiting any of the other breaches in Microsoft Windows and Windows XP."

Microsoft says this is a known problem, and it will soon offer a free patch that should block Latinos. However, customers who want to prevent Eastern Europeans and Asians from sneaking in will have to pay an annual fee for that service. Periodic "Alien Definition File" downloads will be available to those premium customers.

Related Link: MS Means Mediocre Security