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Hussein Asks: “Will These Things Really Work?”

by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · No Comments · · Print This Story Print This Story

(2002-09-16) — Saddam Hussein has invited United Nations’ weapons experts to come to Iraq to examine his nuclear, chemical and biological weapons.
“Frankly, I just want to know if these bombs are going to work,” said Hussein. “Our scientists don’t have enough experience and Iraqis don’t exactly have a reputation for craftsmanship. Who better to judge whether these armaments are functional than the best weapons inspectors in the world?”
Hussein went on to express his bewilderment at his extensive collection of deadly agents like VX, Sarin, mustard gas, anthrax, small pox and even enriched plutonium.
“Oy! Who can keep it all straight?” he asked. “I realized a few months ago that, if we’re going to be world class at deploying this stuff, we’re going to have to think outside of the box…and get some QC people in here.”
The Iraqi leader said he would like to see each weapon of mass destruction imprinted with “Inspected by No. 12…just like my Fruit of the Loom underpants,” he added.

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Tags: Politics