(2008-11-03) — Law enforcement agencies nationwide have gone on high alert, canceling officers’ vacations in advance of Tuesday’s election, after Homeland Security officials picked up “chatter” indicating that if Barack Obama loses to John McCain, pollsters may take to the streets in violent protest.
“This time it’s personal,” said an anonymous pollster who refused to name his company. “Barack Obama is one of our own. He’s a guy who determines reality by asking others what they think, and never says what he really believes. He’s a brother, and it’s our time.”
In addition to kinship ties with Sen. Obama, pollsters say they have a financial stake in the election which depends upon the accomplishment of predetermined benchmarks.
The source said: “If anything happens to undermine our months of hard work — any kind of maverick stuff in the privacy of the voting booth — then President McCain will have blood on his hands.”
17 responses so far ↓
1 gafisher // Nov 3, 2008 at 12:22 pm
I think it’s about time we exit polls.
2 upnorthlurkin // Nov 3, 2008 at 12:24 pm
When Uuhhhhbomba loses, the pollsters should be tarred and feathered and run outta town along with the rest of the LameStream Drive-by Media!! I’ll bring the pillows!
3 gafisher // Nov 3, 2008 at 12:59 pm
unl, whether Obama wins or loses, the polls have lost (tossed!) all credibility.
4 Mack // Nov 3, 2008 at 1:41 pm
Interesting case in the news here. The operator of a group home for mentally challenged adults is in hot water for helping his charges register to vote and getting them to early vote for Obama. The mother of one of them showed her son who has the mental capacity of a 7 year old. The 26 year old was told that Obama was a Republican, like his mother.
Obama supporters are so ethical. His mom is a campaign worker for McCain.
5 upnorthlurkin // Nov 3, 2008 at 2:06 pm
A few years back when our polling place was across the street from a drug rehab center, we had a similar occurance….the residents were dragged in (some of them totally unaware of where they were let alone who/what they were voting for) and coached on how to register (we’re still the only state in the country where we’re not required to register to vote…) which only amounted to spelling their name and address. We were forced to give them ballots and letting them vote. It mattered not that they didn’t know what day it was….they had been schooled to fill in the dot next to anything with a D. The chapperones stood in the doorway smirking. It was so disgusting! I asked our attorney general if anyone in the state had ever been prosecuted for voter fraud and he admitted nobody ever had!
6 Maggie // Nov 3, 2008 at 2:32 pm
UpNorth,
Are you now saying that North Dakota is now a battleground state?……Just kidding :>)
7 Ms RightWing, Ink // Nov 3, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Mack
The same thing happens here. Last night a younger man, who moved here from a group home (thanks HUD) said I hope that other guy, the white guy doesn’t win because he will mess up Social Security.
Now this guy doesn’t have a clue where Social Security comes from. He doesn’t even know McCain’s name, so I guess his workshop ( he is borderline MR ) has told him not to vote for the white guy, what ever his name is.
I was going to ask him who told him that, but I am sooo tired of talking to liberals. I won’t change anybody overnight so I am in the time mode-just waiting it out.
8 everthink // Nov 3, 2008 at 5:32 pm
“When Uuhhhhbomba loses, the pollsters should be tarred and feathered and run outta town along with the rest of the LameStream Drive-by Media!! I’ll bring the pillows!”
Are you sure you have enough pillows? Well, let’s hope you have least one, you’re gonna need it to cry into tomorrow.
Everyone here should check your supply of meds too!
ET
9 mindknumbed kid // Nov 3, 2008 at 5:55 pm
Desperate times call for desperate measures, and if anyone is desperate it is the liberals. Coming unhinged just at the thought of McCain winning.
If the thought of Obama winning this election, then you must be a liberal. I wonder what will happen (if he wins and implements his policies to drive the coal companies out of business) when you walk into your house and flip on a light switch? Little pink houses in total darkness eh, JCM. Maybe they can manage enough power to have lights during the daylight hours like they used to have in places like Romania 25 years ago! I realize that they don’t believe it can happen, but Barryboy didn’t hesitate or even bat an eye when he said it, did he? The economic effects from such action would cause more than a ripple across the rest of the economy, lack of power or no affordable power? Unfathomable. Such change is so short-sighted, makes a person question his other plans for change.
What about this civilian security force? Will it have nuclear capabilities? What type of aircraft will they have? What about its equivalence to the Navy? Will they have a global presence, or just keep guys like me in check? Seems as though a lot of what he says is very generalized and/or ambiguous. Where are all of the inquiring minds? Tom Brokejaw clip on EIB today saying “we don’t know anything about Barack Obama”. Hello! Isn’t that what he and his associates were supposed to be looking into for the past couple of years? Do you mean that America might just elect him tomorrow as a “pig in a poke”? So much for the press as a valuable and useful tool for the American voter’s use! Straight from their own mouth, what an admission!
Isaiah 26:2-5 (King James Version)
2Open ye the gates, that the righteous nation which keepeth the truth may enter in.
3Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.
4Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength:
5For he bringeth down them that dwell on high; the lofty city, he layeth it low; he layeth it low, even to the ground; he bringeth it even to the dust.
Keepeth the truth? Naw, we never bothered to find it…
10 mindknumbed kid // Nov 3, 2008 at 6:08 pm
We don’t need no medication
We all have our thoughts in control
No narcissism within our head dude
Lame - trollie, keep it in your room…
Pills are for those that cannot handle reality, remember those liberal help clinics that popped up after Gore lost? Libs can’t handle it when their sails get deflated unexpectedly. Get ready, man you oughta be used to it.
In future elections we should not only require a valid photo ID, but also administer drug tests at the polls too, no one on mind altering drugs would be allowed to vote - that would take care of about a quarter of the lib-dimdem vote.
11 Fred Sinclair // Nov 3, 2008 at 6:10 pm
I was posting on the last thread when I clicked on Submit - I found this new one in my inbox.
Now I get here and learn another new thread “Obama Fears Millions Might Vote ‘Present’” which hasn’t even made my inbox yet.
12 Fred Sinclair // Nov 3, 2008 at 6:23 pm
mkk #9 - “Do you mean that America might just elect him tomorrow as a “pig in a pokeâ€?”
As a muslim (or non-practicing muslim) would comparing him to a pig, not be an affront? - good!
Actually since all he wants is all there is and then some - wouldn’t that make him a hog? In Congress he sure seems to have an affinity for pork.
When a hog gobbles up all that pork, does that make him guilty of cannibalism?
Inquiring minds want to know.
13 mindknumbed kid // Nov 3, 2008 at 6:37 pm
Fred - I never even thought of that angle. But, please…do we have to mention food? I know, I started it,but it was an accident!
wv - “gracious Carpenter”, Hey! I know him!!
14 camojack // Nov 3, 2008 at 10:23 pm
The only poll that matters is in the poling place.
Those opinion polls have been wrong before, and often…
15 ExtremeCentre.org » La minute du rire: Blog Politique Francophone pour les Libertés Fondamentales et Contre Tous les Totalitarismes, qu'ils soient de Droite ou de Gauche // Nov 4, 2008 at 1:42 am
[...] by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · 14 Comments [...]
16 Pseudo-Polymath » Blog Archive » Tuesday Highlights // Nov 4, 2008 at 10:30 am
[...] Heh again. [...]
17 Stones Cry Out - If they keep silent… » Things Heard: e39v2 // Nov 4, 2008 at 10:31 am
[...] Heh again. [...]
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