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Spiderman Rescues Baby from Clone Cult, Destroys Lab
By Scott Ott, Editor-in-Chief, ScrappleFace.com
News Fairly Unbalanced. We Report. You Decipher.
(2002-12-29) — Spiderman rescued ‘Baby Eve’ yesterday from the clutches of the cult leader, Rael, and destroyed the laboratory where the Raelians were working on a scheme to achieve immortality by implanting their own brains into cloned bodies.
According to a front page story in The Daily Bugle, the web-slinging superhero was briefly distracted by the stunning Brigitte Boisselier, who directs the cult’s company, Clonaid. However, his spider senses alerted him to her real intentions.
Rael, formerly French journalist Claude Vorilhon, somehow escaped from the exploding laboratory after a pitched battle with Spidey. He is expected to return in a future episode.
Dr. Robert Lanza, the head of medical and scientific development for the private genetic research firm Advanced Cell Technologies, said “the world has nothing to fear from cloning technology itself, as long as Spiderman is here to protect us from evil geniuses like Rael.”
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immortality: http://www.cnn.com/2002/HEALTH/12/28/human.cloning/index.html
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