(2006-06-16) — Just a day after Microsoft founder Bill Gates said he would begin stepping back from day-to-day operations at the software giant to focus on his philanthropic work, Apple CEO Steve Jobs told a spellbound crowd that he had developed the cure for AIDS, and expects to ship the cure for cancer in the fourth quarter of 2006.

Mr. Jobs said his AIDS cure is “fast, easy to use and comes in a cool white package that’s so hip people will want to wear it.”

Critics, however, immediately noted that Apple’s iDose HIV-buster medication is expensive, and won’t work at all if the patient is taking any other drug by another manufacturer, even Tylenol.

Patients using iDose will also have to buy a new drinking glass and special water made only by Apple in order to swallow the medicine.

Physicians won’t be able to prescribe the drug, since it will be available only through Mac.com, and from iDose stores in four major cities nationwide.

Meanwhile, the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation celebrated Mr. Gates’ announcement with a press release saying, “It will be good to have Bill’s complete attention at the Foundation. Thanks to Microsoft, he brings a wealth of expertise in preventing the spread of viruses.”