Cyprus to be Auctioned Off at EU Sheriff’s Sale

Cyprus to Be Auctioned at Sheriff's Sale

Someone’s going to pick up a “sweet bargain” next week when the island nation of Cyprus hits the auction block at the EU Sheriff’s sale.

The island nation of Cyprus will be sold to the highest bidder next week at a sheriff’s sale, according to a spokesman from the European Union Sheriff’s Office.

The insolvent Republic of Cyprus simply could not raise the billions of Euros needed to satisfy its obligations, so the entire island in the eastern Mediterranean Sea will go on the block and be snapped up by the highest bidder.

“It’s really a lovely country,” said an unnamed deputy sheriff, “and it’s a shame they couldn’t hold onto it. But somebody’s going to pick up a sweet bargain.”

The day before the auction, Cyprus will hold a yard sale to unload furniture, appliances, vehicles and household knick-knacks to “clear the place out for the new owner.”

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I think the title search will be a problem, since a third is occupied by Turkey.


I’d still like to visit the place someday…I just won’t be opening any bank accounts there.


Maybe the Lusignan dynasty wants to make a bid. Gotta be some descendant still clinging to dreams of the Cypriot throne.


Nobody will buy it, because they can’t afford to pay the back taxes on the property.


I’ll give them €50 for the lawn darts…


I put my happy smile on!


Maybe some pretty female Cypriot could rip down the drapes to make a fancy dress, and then head off in the direction of an uber-wealthy billionaire with the intent to “get the money to pay the taxes on Cyprus.” 😉