NSA Cracks al-Qaeda Snapchat Terror Ring

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Snapchat’s database, just hacked by the NSA, contained a “surprising number” of young, female, topless al-Qaeda agents, according to sources in the Obama administration.

(2014-01-03) — The White House announced today that NSA code crackers hacked a key al-Qaeda Snapchat network, unmasking names and other identifying data of dozens of suspected terrorists–many of whom are surprisingly young, female and topless.

Snapchat is a social networking app that allows users to transmit text and photos designed to disappear from the recipient’s device within seconds. The ephemeral nature of the messages is what turned NSA staffers on to its possible use by the world’s best-known Islamist terror network.

However, unnamed sources admitted that Qaeda’s use of teenaged girls–posing in ways clearly forbidden by the Koran–initially surprised even seasoned espionage experts.

White House spokesman Jay Carney acknowledged that NSA cryptographers could take months to decode the secret messages, but added, “we have our best men on it day and night.”

He said the agency has shifted some analysts to the project who were winding up work on the NSA’s recently-successful Operation Target Shopper.

In the meantime, Carney said parents should inspect their teen’s smartphones and forward any suspicious pictures to the NSA.

The rare public revelation of an NSA covert operation seems aimed at critics who fault the secretive agency for its invasions of privacy, lack of accountability and paucity of demonstrable results in protecting Americans from attacks.

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2 Responses to “NSA Cracks al-Qaeda Snapchat Terror Ring”

  1. Mark says:

    Maybe NSA can co-ordinate with healthcare.gov to identify SnapChat users from the terror ring who are in need of the new mental health services now available under the (un)Afforable Health Care Act.